Forgiveness and Love
by ThunderJovi
Summary: Post 2.15: Maura left, Jane fell apart. Will they be able to pick up where they left off, will they crumble apart, or will they transcend their previous boundaries?
1. Chapter 1

**I have fought with myself about whether or not to write my own _Rizzoli & Isles_ story for a while now, and finally gave in and started typing away.**

**This is a JanexMaura femslash.**

** I will warn you that I jump around a little so some parts may be a little confusing but it eventually the timeline explains itself.  
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**I hope you enjoy.  
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><p><strong><em>Maura<em>** had disappeared three days after Jane made the biggest mistake of her life.

Sure, they could have tracked her through her bank cards, but then they would have had to explain to Maura when she came back why they had felt the need to do so. Neither Frost nor Korsak wanted to be the one to tell her it was because Jane looked so miserable; that Jane had started to say she was going to the morgue during cases when they were getting nowhere fast and then stopped mid-sentence and half standing and staring off in space for several seconds that seemed to drag on before sitting down and staring at the paperwork in front of her.

No one wanted to tell Maura. They wanted her to see for herself.

But that would mean she needed to come back, and after four months they were starting to wonder if she ever would be coming back.

Paddy had died from the fall. Dean was in D.C. again after getting an earful from Jane about how he betrayed her trust and she never wanted to see him again.

For the first time in Jane's career as a homicide detective, she had an unsolved case that was actually going to have to move to cold cases. There wasn't enough forensic evidence, and the new M.E. wasn't as meticulous as Maura.

Everyone felt that loss.

But after four months, they were starting to see the old Jane peeking through again. She was still a shell of her old self, but she wasn't going straight home from work every night, was starting to go to family dinners again. Angela was still living in Maura's guest house, taking care of the main house and Bass, who had been left behind much to Jane's surprise. Family dinners were now at Jane's apartment though; no matter how healed she was becoming, she still couldn't go to Maura's house, at least not if she thought she would be seen there.

Angela knew, of course. She would see Jane's car, or would walk in to see that Bass was already fed. Knowing Jane, though, she chose not to say anything about it. It made sense that she would want to be close to the other woman. After the final incident with Hoyt, Angela could see Jane had become a little more open about her affections towards Maura. She had suspicions before about their relationship, but given Maura's propensity for dating she realized that it was probably one sided on Jane's part. The deal with Hoyt only made her daughter's feelings for Maura that much clearer for Angela, though it seemed that Maura was still oblivious to it.

She wondered if perhaps Jane wasn't as aware of them herself.

Still, four months without seeing the woman you are in love with… Angela studied Jane. She was making an effort to move on, but there was still that empty look in her eyes. Somehow, she thought that it would never leave, not until Maura returned and she could at least see her again.

Ignoring the emptiness, Angela smiled at her three kids and enjoyed their time together. Jane may not be complete now, but at least she was still here.

**_She_** walked into her house and set down her luggage. The cab driver carried in the rest and set them down as well.

"Thank you," she told him, giving him a generous tip. He tipped his hat and walked out, the door closing behind him. Taking a deep breath, she gathered the bags and slowly made her way up to her room to unpack.

**_They_** had finally found a solid lead in their case on Tuesday, and it was closed on Wednesday. Jane smiled and made a show of celebrating. She even agreed to join the team for drinks that evening. She hadn't had a good night's sleep in several days because of this case, and she felt it. Telling Frost she was going to get a little rest before joining them at the Robber, Jane gathered her things and left the precinct.

She considered going by Maura's. Her mother was still at work, and Bass probably wouldn't mind a little company. He would probably appreciate a few strawberries, too. Smiling fondly, she drove that way.

The house was silent, as it always was when she arrived. Closing the door, Jane walked to the kitchen and opened the fridge to get the strawberries. Turning, she closed the door and looked for Bass, frowning when she realized he wasn't within sight. The tortoise rarely left the kitchen and living room anymore, unless Jane was here and crashed on the guest bed. Curious, she went to the guest room and smiled; Bass was peeking out from under the bed.

"Come on, bud," she said, kneeling down and offering a strawberry. Seeing a familiar person, Bass didn't shy away and stepped towards her to get the strawberry. "Let's go to the living room, eh? We can share these by the couch." Standing straight, she started to walk down the hall before looking back. Sure enough, Bass was following her. A fond but sad smile on her face, she continued to the couch to sit down. She ate a couple strawberries before Bass appeared, and then sprawled out across the couch and offered him another strawberry. He settled in next to the couch and took the strawberry; this wasn't the first time they had done this.

It was the first time that Jane fell asleep during this ritual.

**_Maura_** woke up refreshed. Traveling had messed up her internal clock, so the sleep was a relief. She was glad to be in her own bed again. With a small smile, she moved to the bathroom to shower and dress in something without wrinkles.

Feeling a lot better, she took a deep breath and left the room to go into the kitchen; Bass would surely want some attention from her. Despite being a tortoise and not being as interactive and a dog or cat, she knew he liked her and wanted her around. She felt bad for not speaking with him before falling into her bed, but she had felt so tired after arriving in the early morning. Walking through the kitchen in bare feet, she opened the fridge to see if Angela had made sure to keep things for Bass in there. She had expected to find strawberries, knowing that she had reiterated to Angela that they were his favorite, and frowned when she saw none.

She heard a bump from the living room, and turned. Bass must have gotten caught on the coffee table.

"Unn…" A moan, from the couch? Maura froze, unsure of what to do. Her first thought had been that a burglar had broken in and decided to sleep on the couch, but she quickly tossed that thought aside. "Hey, Bass, what're you doing? Is the table in your way again?"

Jane sat up and put the strawberries on the table before pushing it a little. Bass, obstacle now removed, moved on happily. Amused, Jane chuckled and ran a hand through her hair.

"Man, I must've been more tired than I thought. I only meant to stay for a half hour to keep you company, bud, so you could have a few strawberries," Jane told him before yawning and standing. She lifted the strawberries and turned to go to the kitchen. She hadn't gone more than a step when she froze.

Maura had relaxed when she had recognized Jane, but then she tensed up again. What was she doing here? No one knew she was home, she was sure of it. There was no way Angela had been up that early and seen her. And even if she had, Maura doubted she would tell Jane. But when Jane admitted that she had come to visit Bass, she couldn't stop the smile as the tension fell away again.

But then Jane was standing, and their eyes met.

"Jane…"

"Maura…"

They stood there staring at each other for a few more seconds before Jane's eyes went wide.

"Shit, I'm sorry! Ma told me you'd left Bass, so I've been coming by and… God, I didn't even think about if you'd want me to or not… I mean-" Jane grimaced and her shoulders dropped. Maura studied the brunette, noticing that she looked thinner than before, and her stance wasn't as proud or strong. She wondered what had happened to Jane.

She happened.

Maura felt guilt sink in. She had been angry with Jane, blaming her for what happened to Paddy; for killing her one connection to her true identity. She felt betrayed, and that feeling made her run away.

But it hadn't taken long for her to forgive Jane. It had been easy, actually, when she found herself in Italy, surrounded by the culture that was Jane's heritage. Interacting with the people there, she felt a little more comfortable in her own skin because despite her shortcomings socially, they reminded her of Jane in some way. And she was always accepted by Jane.

Coming out of her reverie, Maura saw that Jane had walked up to the counter and put down the strawberries, eyes downcast, before turning to leave.

"Jane…" she breathed. The brunette didn't pause, continuing to the door. "Jane, wait." And Jane waited, hand on the door handle. "I… Thank you, for keeping him company while I was gone."

"No problem. He… It helped," Jane said before opening the door and leaving before Maura could stop her again.

And leaving Maura alone with her thoughts.

Jane never did show up at the Robber that night, either.


	2. Chapter 2

_****_**I was pleasantly surprised to find that many people seem to enjoy this story. Thank you to those who reviewed and to the others that added an alert. I am pleased that the story wasn't absolutely horrible.**

**Here is chapter 2, so enjoy.  
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><p><em><strong>When<strong>_ Jane walked into the precinct looking like the walking dead after all the progress she'd made to look like she was living again, Frost knew something had happened after Jane left yesterday. She hadn't even shown up for drinks after saying she would, though he figured that had been because she'd been passed out. Now though, he wondered.

He and Korsak exchanged glances.

"Hey, Rizzoli," Korsak said cautiously. Jane looked at him and forced a small smile on her face. "So, uh, we missed you last night."

Jane sunk into her chair. "Yeah, I was dead last night. Woke up long enough to eat and watch a little TV before passing out again."

"Yeah, I hear ya. Too bad, though, you missed Frankie drunk dancing," Frost said with a grin, trying to pull Jane from her stupor. Jane rolled her eyes, and looked at her computer. He was about to say something else when Cavanaugh walked in.

"Good news, you guys. Starting Monday, Dr. Isles will be back in the morgue," he said. Frost shot a glance at Jane; she didn't look surprised, only a little more haunted than usual. "Hopefully now you'll stop bitching about the autopsy reports, yeah?"

The detectives chattered about the Doc's return, gossiping about where she'd gone and why she was back. Korsak and Frost just studied Jane.

She shot them both a glare.

"What?" she snapped, though the word stopped having its usual bite several months ago. Neither gentleman flinched.

"You don't seem all that surprised," Frost stated, feeling only a little brave. Jane shrugged but turned her gaze back to the computer. "Did you run into her or something?"

"You're not gonna leave me alone until I tell you, are you?" Jane grumbled.

"Nope," he answered.

Jane sighed and sat back. "I've been stopping by her house every so often, to see Bass you know? So I went there after I left yesterday and we bonded over strawberries like usual, me on the couch and him beside it. I'd fell asleep, and an hour later I wake up and Maura was in the kitchen."

Korsak whistled. "That had to be a shocker."

"What did Maura say?" Frost asked.

"Thanked me for keeping him company. I dunno if she was gonna say anything else, I got out as fast as I could," Jane told them. "Now, can I get started on the paperwork finally?"

_**Angela **_had been as warm and open as usual when she'd walked in and found out Maura was home. She asked about all her travels, wanting to know everything. Maura was thankful when she didn't bring up Jane at first, unsure of how to talk about that still.

Still, avoiding touchy subjects just wouldn't be Angela, Maura decided. The woman immediately offered to make dinner, which Maura happily took advantage of. She was still worn out from her sabbatical.

"Have you seen Jane yet?" Angela asked while she cooked, Maura watching from her seat at the counter.

Maura tensed up again, her mind trying to come up with a way to move away from Jane. Not coming up with anything, she sighed and gave in. "Yes, she had been here yesterday afternoon to visit with Bass. I had been in bed at the time. I think she fell asleep on the couch or I wouldn't have seen her. She told Bass she hadn't planned on staying long."

Angela smiled fondly. "I knew she was coming by and taking care of Bass sometimes. I hadn't realized she was talking to him now. I know she used to ignore him when she'd come over."

"Yes she did," Maura reiterated with her own fond smile.

"When do you go back to work?"

"Monday, officially, though I thought I might go in tomorrow morning just to do some organizing. I'm sure my temporary replacement hasn't been as organized as I would prefer," Maura said.

Angela nodded. "You should stop by and say hello to everyone. The whole department up there has been whining about your absence when they would come to the coffee shop." Angela continued, putting together the finishing touches for dinner. "Did you meet anyone while you were gone?"

_**The**_ next morning, Jane looked just as dead as the day before.

"Come one, cheer up, Rizzoli. At least it's Friday!" Korsak tried. Jane didn't even flinch, instead staring at her desk. Sighing, the old man shook his head and focused on his own paperwork. He was starting to wish Frost hadn't taken a personal day; he could use a little help getting Rizzoli to cheer up. As much as he hated to admit it, the kid had a sense of humor that topped his any day.

About midmorning, the familiar tapping of heels caught everyone's attention. Heads snapped up and cheers erupted as Maura walked into the bullpen. She smiled, thanking Angela mentally for giving her the push to come up here. She had wanted to put it off as long as possible, because she wasn't sure what to say to Jane yet. But seeing everyone happy to see her again felt good.

"Hey, Doc, good to have you back," Korsak said with a big grin on his face.

"Thank you, Vince. It is certainly good to be back," Maura admitted, her eyes going to Jane. The brunette hadn't bothered to lift her head. She felt her smile falter as she looked at Vince again. Vince saw, and tossed a paper ball at Jane, hitting her in the shoulder.

Jane jumped and looked at Korsak, confused. Then she saw Maura and winced, looking down.

"Jane," Maura started before pausing, not sure what to say.

"Welcome back, Dr. Isles," Jane said, her tone full of sadness and the words feeling foreign in her mouth. Even Maura flinched at hearing her professional name being said with Jane's voice.

"Jane, could we… talk?" she asked finally. Jane glanced over at her, contemplating the question. "It doesn't have to be now, just… Come and see me when you're ready?"

Jane couldn't find the words, so she just nodded. Maura felt lighter with that motion and offered Jane a smile. When Jane smiled back, albeit with a small one, Maura felt like she had won a small victory.

She turned to Vince and smiled. "I'll take my leave. I want to see how much damage my replacement has done do my office."

"You might want to start your relaxation breathing now, then," Jane told her, her eyes back on the paperwork as she continued working. "He's… not you, that's for sure."

Maura grimaced. "Thank you for the warning. I had expected some disarray, but I think you are implying something worse than I could imagine."

With no answer from Jane, Maura turned and left for the morgue.

_**It was**_ almost quitting time when Jane appeared in Maura's office. It was starting to look like hers again, though Maura thought that she still had a long way to go. After Maura left, Jane couldn't even leave the elevator at this level. Even once she could, she never felt comfortable down here; it just wasn't the same without Maura and her quirkiness. Even getting through autopsies was hard.

"Jane," Maura greeted her, smiling brightly. Jane couldn't help but return the smile with one a little better than when they had spoken in the bullpen. "I admit, I thought it would take you a little more time to feel comfortable with… this."

"This" being approaching Maura to talk about everything, Jane decided.

"Yeah, I thought about waiting until tomorrow since Ma informed me we were having family dinner at your place again Sunday whether I liked it or not, and we need to talk before that happens, but…" Jane shrugged. "Part of me couldn't wait to see you again."

Maura was delighted to hear that confession.

"I've missed you, Maura," Jane admitted softly. "And, I'm really sorry about… about what happened. All of it, from the time I left you in the hospital with your mother to the moment that… that I…"

"I forgive you, Jane. I forgave you a few months ago, actually." Maura hadn't meant to admit that much, not wanting to cause a setback before they even got started.

Jane frowned at her. "Then, why didn't you call me? Or email me, or something. A post card would've been great, even. I was… afraid you were gone for good."

"I'm sorry, Jane," Maura said, looking at her hands. "Honestly, I was so wrapped up in my own world it didn't even occur to me."

Jane snorted as she collapsed on the couch. There was silence for a moment while they both considered the next thing to say.

"Jane?" Maura couldn't handle the silence again, feeling that even if she couldn't come up with something to say, she still wanted Jane's attention.

She watched Jane's eyes close and her head fall, the tears finally releasing after months of holding them back. "God…" she croaked. "I am so sorry…"

Maura moved to sit with her, pulling her into her embrace as she cried. "It's all right, Jane. Everything is going to be all right."


	3. Chapter 3

_****_**This chapter's a bit longer, but only because I didn't like where I had split it between chapter three and four, because of the content that I wanted to have in each of them.**

**Enjoy.  
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><p><em><strong>Maura<strong>_ drove Jane home once she had stopped crying. Neither spoke on the way, both afraid that they wouldn't be able to keep it together if they spoke.

Once in the apartment, Maura ordered a pizza while Jane sat on the couch. She opened the fridge, not really all that surprised to see that there was only milk and beer in there. Shaking her head, she grabbed two beers and walked to the couch to give Jane one of them.

"Thanks," Jane said, voice cracking a little. Maura nodded and opened her beer, taking a sip and closing her eyes to savor it. It had been a while since she'd drunk a beer; she found that she had missed it. "No beer on your trip?"

Maura looked at Jane to see her smirking, though it lacked its usual shine in her eyes. "No, there wasn't. I did have lots of wine though, many straight from the vineyards in Europe."

"Fascinating."

"I brought quite a bit back. You'll have to try a few," Maura said, looking forward and not at Jane. There was a positive noise, and then silence.

"That all you're gonna tell me about your adventures?" Maura shook her head, but didn't continue. Jane sighed. "You wanna talk about this… whatever first don't you?"

"I would like to touch on the subject some," Maura admitted. She looked at Jane and studied her. "I would like to know what happened to you. You look…"

"Like shit, I know. Hard to care when…" Jane shook her head, but forced a smile, knowing that it would fall short of looking like anything but uncomfortable. "I was awful, after the first couple weeks. I mean, I figured you'd be back after a few weeks and even if we weren't talking at least you'd still be there. Then you didn't come back."

Maura had the decency to look guilty at that. "You're right, I didn't. And I was selfish in my desire to stay away."

Jane grunted and took a drink. A knock announced the arrival of the pizza, so Jane got up to get plates while Maura paid the delivery man and took the pizza to counter.

"Why did you let go so much?" Maura asked, going back to the conversation regarding Jane's appearance.

"Where was the point?" Jane asked with a shrug.

"I'm not sure I understand what you mean."

Jane considered her words carefully for a moment. "You always say your fault is that you aren't good at being social, to be around live people, right?" Maura nodded. "Well, my fault is that I don't let people in. When you were gone, you felt you were able to be social because of me, right?" Another nod and Maura's eyes widened as she realized what Jane was implying. "You were the one I had let in. And you left me."

"Jane…"

Jane shrugged and, putting pizza on her plate, escaped to the couch again. Maura quickly followed suit, but she put her plate aside to focus solely on Jane. Jane, on the other hand, was pointedly ignoring her. A thought occurred to Maura as she considered what Jane said.

"What about Dean?"

Jane snorted, quickly swallowing the bite she'd taken before she choked on it. "Fuck him. I trusted him with the whole Doyle thing because I wanted to be able to protect you somehow. And he gave me his word he'd hold back until I gave him the go ahead. If the dick hadn't gone to the warehouse, who's to say what would have happened? Maybe Doyle wouldn't be dead. If I'd been in Doyle's shoes, I'd have pointed a gun at me too if I'd been shot by a Fed and didn't know if someone else would shoot me too. And if Doyle hadn't shot a Fed and turned the gun on me and Frost, maybe I wouldn't have shot him."

Maura nodded. "That's true. I had considered all of that."

Jane hummed and took a drink. "What made you bring him up, anyway?"

"I assumed he had been let in, since you engaged in intercourse."

"No way, he wasn't let in. I slept with him, yes, but he definitely didn't make it that far under my skin. You, on the other hand, have full access." Jane sighed. "He tried to touch me when he woke up, before I was awake, and I smacked his hand away."

Maura couldn't help but laugh. "I almost feel sorry for him."

"Yeah, well don't. He sucked in the sack, extremely boring," Jane told her, unable to keep from laughing along with her.

As they settled and the TV was turned on, Maura thought that perhaps Jane would recover now. And, perhaps even she would be able to as well.

_**Jane**_ woke up with a weight on her right side and peeked open one eye to see a mess of blond hair. She couldn't help the smile that broke out on her face as she closed her eye and basked in the feeling of the other woman cuddled into her side.

She felt Maura take a deep breath, signaling her waking.

A moment later, Jane spoke. "I must admit, sleeping with you is definitely comfortable. I always sleep better."

"Studies have said that humans tend to-" A hand was placed over her mouth.

"Maura, I love your googlemouth and I have totally missed it, but it's too early," Jane groaned, detaching herself from the blond to get up and go to the bathroom.

She missed the smile Maura wore after she heard Jane say she loved her "googlemouth." If she'd seen it, she'd have probably questioned why she had a silly look on her face. Then she'd probably joke about the fact that there was a silly look on her face after waking up next to her, and spout off some innuendo to hide behind.

Maura frowned. Or would Jane have just let it be? After all, Jane wasn't quite who she was before the separation. And even though she felt they had made progress since Friday night, she could tell Jane was still holding back. She just wished she knew what was making Jane so hesitant.

Her thoughts were interrupted as Jane came back. "I know you're not gonna like this, but since you wore the _only_ thing of yours I still had here yesterday, you'll have to go home in my clothes or wrinkled unwashed clothes."

Maura made a face. She hadn't thought about that. Of course, staying over last night had been entirely accidental. "I suppose I can make do with your clothes, so long as they aren't dirty."

"I'll even dig out my ironing board and you can make doubly sure their de-wrinkled," Jane joked until she saw Maura's face brighten. "Maura, do you really think I own an iron, let alone an ironing board?"

And then the face fell. Jane sighed.

"Oh, Jane, I'll manage. It's not like I'll be in your clothes all day and in public," Maura told her, getting up to go to the bathroom. Jane chuckled at her, because Maura was wearing her clothes right now too. And she wondered if she ever made those shorts look that sexy, or if it was just Maura.

Most likely, it was just Maura.

_**Maura**_ was roped into helping Angela cook, and Jane happily sat on the couch with Bass at her feet. She had a socked foot rubbing his shell, something she'd discovered by accident that he seemed to enjoy. But she didn't question it, because who was she to deny the tortoise?

"You seem pretty cozy with that turtle," Tommy commented as he sat down, sinking into the chair.

"Tortoise," Jane and Maura corrected him, earning Jane a bright smile from Maura that she didn't see because her eyes were on the TV. "We bonded over strawberries, okay? Besides, he's not so bad once you get to know him." Frankie laughed. "What?"

"Nothing, nothing," Frankie said, trying to hold in his laughter.

"Bass is awesome," Jane said, pushing him in the shoulder, "in his own way. He may not be as interactive as Jo, but at least he's appreciative and doesn't demand a lot."

"Which is why you're rubbing your foot on his shell?" Frankie asked.

"You scare him, and he likes it, so this is me comforting him in a way," Jane explained, shooting him a dirty look. "Back off, all right? Me and Bass are buddies."

"Bass and I," she heard Maura correct her.

Jane smirked. "Right, Bass and I are buddies."

Frankie started at the sight of the smirk. It wasn't like the half-hearted smirks he'd seen, and it was almost frightening.

"What the hell are you looking at?" she mumbled, turning to Bass because she didn't really want an answer. "Hey, bud, how about a strawberry? I bet I can get Maura to bring one over to give you."

"No. You do not need to spoil his dinner," Maura answered. Jane scoffed, and whispered that she'd get him a couple strawberries later. "I heard that Jane. Bass will get a strawberry or two with dinner. You've got him spoiled enough already."

"You're just jealous because I give him strawberries," Jane retorted, looking over her shoulder at her friend.

Maura raised an eyebrow in her. "I don't see how that has anything to do with this. Bass getting strawberries would be like allowing him to eat dessert all the time. As for me, getting strawberries would be a healthy snack. There isn't a proper correlation there."

"Fine, then _you_ are just jealous I don't let you eat dessert all the time," Jane said, adding a wink just for fun. Frankie and Tommy burst out laughing, causing Jane to miss the color on Maura's cheeks as she realized what that could imply.

"All right, kids, be good," Angela said just to remind them she was here. "Maura, would you mind getting a salad put together?"

"Hm? Oh, of course not," Maura said, glad to have something to distract her from the thoughts Jane had pulled unbidden from within her. At one time, intimate thoughts about Jane weren't uncommon, but she wasn't usually affected too much by them. She thought it was because she and Jane had a very close friendship. But during her absence she was afraid they had become all too common, and Maura had a hard time figuring out how she felt about that.

Maura felt unbalanced.

_**After **_dinner and cleanup, and once the other Rizzoli's had left, Jane fell onto the couch with some strawberries, waiting for Bass to make it over to her. Maura had tried to tell her not to feed him any but Jane wouldn't have it since Maura didn't give Bass any with his dinner.

"_Come on, Maura. It's us time. Me and Bass and the strawberries."_

"_Bass and I. And you already have him spoiled. I would like to get him back on a proper eating schedule again with a proper diet."_

"_Maura…" Jane whined._

And of course, Maura gave in. She watched as Bass made his way to the couch fairly quickly and smiled, happy to see that he liked Jane finally. They had never gotten along before, mostly because Jane wanted nothing to do with him and Bass was too scared of her to even give her a chance.

She watched Jane lean over to give him a strawberry, and then ate one herself.

"I hadn't been informed that you would be eating them too," Maura said.

"Well, yeah. It's us time, so we share them. Did you really think I was going to feed him six strawberries, Maura?" Jane asked with a smirk. Maura refused to comment, choosing instead walk around the couch and lift Jane's legs to sit down, her feet landing in Maura's lap. Jane leaned down to give Bass another strawberry, and offered the other to Maura, who took it graciously.

Silence fell over them. Maura, needing something to do besides follow her thoughts, started to rub Jane's feet. She heard Jane hum in content, her lips turning up at the thought that she was giving Jane something.

Jane was so lost in the sensation that she was surprised to hear the TV come on. Opening one eye, she groaned. "What? No, we are not watching… whatever this is."

Maura kept the remote, lips quivering as she tried not to smile and to keep a serious look on her face. Jane's eyes narrowed and she set the bowl on the side before sitting up and putting her feet on the floor. She scooted a little closer to Maura, and waited. She saw Maura's eyes glance over to her, and then Jane grinned as her finger jabbed at Maura's spot in her side.

Maura yelped, jumping up and away from Jane, who nabbed the remote and jumped into her previous position, pretending not to notice the glare Maura was sending her. "You are insufferable."

Jane sent her a bright grin. "You love me."

Maura felt something in her chest at the words.

_**Monday**_ morning, Frost looked up to see Jane walk in looking tired but with a little more life to her. Korsak had told him about Friday when he came in, so he had prepared for the worst. Instead, he found himself looking at Jane with a smirk.

Jane was in her seat before she noticed. Her eyes narrowed at him. "What are you looking at?"

"You," he answered coyly. "You have a good weekend?"

"Maybe, what's it to you?" Jane asked, pointedly ignoring him. Frost shook his head, but wasn't given a chance to answer before they were called away for a body and the conversation was set aside to be brought up later.

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><p><strong>Just so you know, I will probably elude to cases but I won't delve into them. I haven't quite gotten the hang of crime writing. My mind jumps around too much for me to be able to keep the evidence straight and all that. So, I hope that's not a problem.<strong>


	4. Chapter 4

__**I fought myself over this chapter all weekend. I had it pretty much written when I posted chapter 3, and then I reordered some stuff and deleted some stuff because I really hated the chapter as it had been then. I don't think I'm completely satisfied with it now, but I felt this was needed. Besides, I needed a catalyst.**

**Enjoy.  
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><p><em><strong>Jane<strong>_ was cold, even under the blanket she sat under as she stared out over the city from the roof she was on. Closing her eyes, she tried to think back to what she'd done over the last couple days.

Friday, she drove by Maura's hoping to just hang out and watch movies like old times, but there was a man in the living her. She saw him through the window. She didn't know why the sight made her chest hurt and eyes close to stop the tears, but she definitely wasn't going to stay and think about it. So she went home, took out all the beer from her fridge, sat on the couch and drank until she passed out.

Saturday she decided she was going to drink all night someplace no one would think to look for her at, so she dropped off Jo and dressed down in a pair of ripped jeans and whatever shirt smelled cleanest. She remembered finding a hole-in-the-wall pub and going inside, ordering whiskey straight and glaring at anyone who dared approach her.

Then it got a little hazy, which is probably why she woke up naked in bed with an equally naked and fairly attractive woman Sunday morning. Instead of leaving, since they had apparently gone to her place, she stayed and they continued the night's activities without the clumsiness from alcohol.

Sunday night found her driving to Maura's for dinner and chickening out, guilt and shame flooding through her. Sure, Maura had probably slept with the guy from Friday, but at least it hadn't been a drunken one-night stand that happened to carry over until early afternoon.

Sex wasn't all that bad of a cure for a hangover, once you got enough water down, Jane found out.

Last night hadn't been the first time she'd gone out and gotten wasted beyond remembering anything. But usually she woke up in her apartment on the couch when it happened. Her recent calls would reveal that she had called Marissa and, after apologizing to the younger woman, was grateful to hear that she hadn't woken her up, and that the call had been made before midnight and she hadn't fallen asleep yet.

Last night was the first time she'd gone home with someone. And she hadn't slept with a woman since she'd graduated from the Academy and had a short stint until the woman realized Jane was a cop first and left. It was the last time Jane even considered a woman.

Well, until Maura, but Maura was her best friend.

She drove past the house and went back to her apartment. After sleeping for a couple hours, she called in sick for Monday. She didn't have the strength to look Maura in the eye yet.

Which led her to sitting on the roof of her apartment in the middle of the night wearing shorts and a t-shirt under a blanket with a bottle of whisky in her hands, not knowing what the hell she was doing anymore.

_**Monday**_ came around quickly for Maura. She'd had a decent date on Friday and they'd gone back to her place for a nightcap before she saw him off a little before midnight. All day Saturday she had spent out window shopping with the occasional purchase. Though she had hoped to see Jane Saturday night, she didn't really think much of it because she figured she'd see her Sunday for dinner if not earlier.

But Jane didn't show up Sunday, and she hadn't been in her apartment. Angela had said Jane dropped off Jo Friday Saturday afternoon and had alluded to going somewhere overnight, though she had expected her to be back for dinner.

Concerned but unable to change anything, Maura let it go in favor of interrogating Jane on Monday.

Except, when she walked into the bullpen, Jane wasn't there for her to interrogate and neither of her partners knew where she was.

"She called in last night, said she was sick. Sounded like shit, too, according to the dispatch officer that took the call," Korsak told her. "Don't worry too much, Doc. She'll be back tomorrow kicking our asses for worrying over nothing otherwise."

Maura nodded, but couldn't shake the concern she felt. Thanking Korsak, she left the bullpen and went down to the morgue. Sitting at her desk, she considered her options.

Jane wasn't home all weekend. She isn't answering the phone. She called in sick for Monday.

Maura closed her eyes and leaned back. "Jane, what are you up to?"

Resigned, she stood and told her assistant to call if anything came up; she was going to be leaving for the morning and possibly the day. Then she left, heading to Jane's.

_**The apartment**_ was empty when Maura walked in. But the blanket from the bed was gone, so Maura knew Jane had been here. On an impulse, she headed for the roof.

Sure enough, huddled up on the roof passed out was Jane, an empty bottle of whiskey nearby.

"Oh, Jane…" she whispered. She had thought the brunette had been making progress this week. They hadn't seen each other except for a quick lunch in the morgue a couple times this week because of a couple cases that fell on the detective's lap. It was obvious Jane was still holding back, but Maura thought that things were going so well. "What caused this relapse?"

Shaking her head, she knelt down and gave Jane a gentle shake, pleased to hear a low moan followed by the fluttering of eyelids that winced from the sunlight.

"Maura?" she croaked, mouth and throat dry. "What are you doing here?"

"I came to check on you. Korsak said you had called in sick, and I was worried since I hadn't seen you all weekend," Maura explained.

Jane grunted and shifted to pull the blanket over her head. "Go away."

"No. I thought you were doing better, Jane. What happened?"

"What do you care?"

Maura felt anger boil up inside her at that. "What do you mean, what do I care? Jane, you're my friend, and I care about you. I don't want to see you hurting yourself like this."

Jane let out a hoarse laugh. "Like you didn't want to see me hurting when you left, right? You were the only one that was hurt that day, the only one that felt crushed by the events…" Jane's voice cracked into a sob.

Maura sat on her knees and pulled Jane to her. "I know, Jane. I know it hurt."

Jane pushed herself away from Maura and got to her feet, anger in her eyes even if she was squinting from the sun and tears were streaming down her face. "I can't do this right now. You've already told me why you left, why you didn't come back, and I've tried to accept it, to pretend everything is fine. Well, it's not Maura. I can't pretend that it is anymore, and that it doesn't still hurt. I can't pretend that nothing has changed.

"And for the love of God, I can't explain why!" Jane yelled, hands clenched and eyes closed. "I don't know why it hurts knowing you went on a date on Friday. I don't know why I can forgive you when I hurt so much. I don't know why I can't hate you for leaving me." Maura heard the sobs again, and got up, rushing to Jane to hold her as they fell to their knees again. "For the life of me, I can't figure out why I can't hate you."

Maura wasn't sure what to say, the anger that had flared at the beginning of Jane's rant cooling at the sight of her tears, so she just sat there letting everything sink in as she held Jane. Her mind went over the words, examining everything Jane said.

Both of their knees were numb when Jane finally calmed down and allowed Maura to lead her back to her apartment, the blanket wrapped around Jane's body as though it could protect Jane from the world. Maura made Jane lay down in bed, the brunette not putting up a fight. She was done fighting, she decided, as she curled up in her cocoon and closed her eyes.

The bed dipped, and she opened an eye to see Maura lying down next to her.

"What-" she started before feeling Maura's arms around her, holding her to her.

"Relax, Jane. Just sleep for now. We can talk about it later, okay?" Maura told her. Jane wanted to put up a fight, but she was so tired of fighting, of trying to be strong when she wasn't. "I won't leave again, I promise. Try to relax and get some sleep."

Jane's eyes closed without her permission, and she felt herself drift off into a dreamless sleep.

_**It was **_almost four when Jane woke up again. True to her word, Maura was still laying with her, arms wrapped around her protectively. She pulled away, and Maura loosened her hold just a little, though she was still touching her. Jane wasn't sure if she was glad or not that they were still physically connected.

"How are you feeling?" Maura asked. Jane grunted and tried to force moisture into her mouth. "Let me get you some water."

Jane watched her leave before untangling herself from the blanket to go to the bathroom. Her bladder was seriously pissed off at her. When she came out, Maura was leaning against the wall opposite the door and holding a glass of water out for her. Jane took it and drank down the whole thing before going to the kitchen to refill it, knowing that Maura would insist on watching her drink at least three glasses before she was satisfied that Jane wasn't going to die of dehydration.

"Do you want to tell me what caused your relapse now?" Maura asked, leaning her hip against the counter.

"Do I have the option to say no?" Jane asked before drinking down the glass of water.

"You do, but I would really like to get past this. I want us to be able to move forward, Jane. If there's still this rift between us we can't get better. Our relationship will eventually fall apart. I would prefer to keep it alive. You are very important to me."

Jane grunted as she refilled her glass again, realizing that she was really thirsty anyway so drinking more water wasn't really a bad idea. "What if I said I would rather wait?"

"I could probably deal with that, but may I ask for how long?"

Jane shrugged. "How about dinner first and we'll see." Knowing it was useless to argue at this moment, Maura picked up the phone to order something in.


	5. Chapter 5

_****_**A few things. One, it's not my best work. I was inspired to write about an hour ago and this was what my brain pooped out.**

**Two, these two women are best friends that have feelings for each other but either don't realize it or won't give in to it. Keep in mind that Maura is very rational and Jane is pretty much emotionally spent, because you'll probably be frustrated by the end of this chapter.**

**Don't worry, I'll make up for it with the next one if my brain goes where it's thinking about going.**

**Enjoy!  
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><p><em><strong>The TV<strong>_ was on with the volume low, neither of the room's occupants moving as one waited for the other, who was trying to come up with something to say. Jane didn't know what had happened, but she knew that she wouldn't be able to avoid the topic, not with Maura. She wasn't even sure she wanted to avoid it, though she knew that whatever was said now would determine their relationship.

"If you don't want to speak, then perhaps I could ask you a few things?" Maura asked. She was tired of the silence, and part of her was aware that the longer she let Jane think about this the less likely she was going to get the full story. They were both good at bending the truth and revealing only what they wanted others to know.

"I'd rather we just forgot the whole thing," Jane grumbled, earning a glare. "Fine, sure, ask away."

Maura turned her body so she was sitting facing the detective. "You said you were upset about Friday. Why? And how did you know? I didn't even know until just before lunch, and we hadn't had a chance to speak that day."

Jane grunted. "Of course you bring that up." She got up to get another beer. "I drove to your place, hoping we could hang out like old times since I'd barely seen you all week." She stood in the kitchen and took a drink, but didn't walk back to the couch. "But I guess I got too cozy with the idea that we could go back to the way things were before, when you would at least send a text if you had a date because there was a good chance I could show up unannounced at any moment."

It was true, Maura knew that. "Is that why you were so upset? Because I wasn't alone and waiting for you?"

"Yes!" Jane hissed, before grimacing. "I mean, not that I expect you to... You've been back for a week, Maura. I hadn't expected… that. And it hurt to see him in your house when… when I wanted to see you."

"Jane…" Maura wanted to walk over to her friend, but she seemed to realize Jane wasn't done. And when a calm look that Maura thought might be from realization passed over her friend's features, curiosity held her tongue.

"God…" Jane whispered, setting down her beer and leaning into the counter with a humorless laugh that made Maura's eyebrows furrow with confusion. Jane's eyes met hers. "I hated knowing you went on a date, Maura. I hated knowing that that man's presence was most likely due to a date and not a friendly visit, not that late at night."

Jane pushed away from the counter and laughed, sounding half crazed. Maura wondered if she shouldn't have let Jane drink tonight after last night's stint. Perhaps the woman had been still drunk, despite the evidence that said otherwise earlier. How else could she explain this behavior?

"You already said that, Jane. I understand that I should have at least warned you, and if I had known you wanted to come over I wouldn't have agreed to the date for that evening and requested Saturday instead."

"You don't get it, Maura," Jane said, shaking her head. "Of course you don't…"

Maura stood and started walking to the kitchen. "Then help me understand! I want to understand, Jane. Whatever is going on in your head, I want to know about it."

"It's not just that I was upset about not spending time with you, Maura," Jane admitted. "I could have easily just come over Saturday afternoon because you rarely have a second date so soon and we could have hung out then. But… Maura, when I saw him in your living room I cried."

"Why would you…" Maura trailed off, her mind going over everything she knew about Jane, and nothing could explain this fact. Jane just didn't cry over things like Maura having a date and not telling her; she got angry and they had a shouting match until they felt better and moved on.

Jane finished off her beer and dropped the bottle in the trash bin before approaching Maura, standing right in front of her with a small smile. "Maura, I'm not an emotional person, you know that. Hell, I can practically see the gears turning as you are undoubtedly trying to figure out how that situation could warrant me in tears. I'm also a sore loser, and when I've lost before I've even played the game I tend to get a little more emotional than usual."

"Now I'm really confused," Maura said, taking a couple steps back. Her entire body was humming with something similar to nervousness. Or perhaps it was anticipation, though she was unsure what she was anticipating.

Jane shrugged and leaned back against the counter. She didn't stop Maura was walking away from her, didn't pull her back. She wasn't even sure how to explain what she was feeling. Part of her hoped Maura would have figured it out by now so that she didn't have to say it.

"I love you, Maura," she said. "And I'm talking about hardcore, can't-breathe-without-you, sun-always-shining-when-you're-around, make-me-want-to-be-a-better-person kind of love."

Maura's eyes widened and her mouth formed an "o" as she realized what Jane was saying. There was silence as Jane prepared for the worst and Maura analyzed everything. And then Maura laughed, which caused Jane to bristle.

"I know you're not all that knowledgeable about social etiquette in these kinds of situations, but usually when you hear a confession like that you don't laugh," Jane scowled as she built back up her walls.

"Oh Jane, I know that. I think I'm more relieved that anything," Maura told her, calming down. "I don't read people well, Jane, you know that. Sometimes I get the social cues wrong and make a fool of myself. You've been giving me signs for a while and I've ignored them because I thought I was just being hopeful. You're my best friend, and I've never had one before. But I have had many people hit up on me and you were showing me some of the signs and I just… I wasn't sure what to do."

Now Jane looked confused. "What the hell are you talking about? That was one of those in-the-moment epiphanies." She frowned and mumbled, thinking Maura wouldn't hear, "Though I guess that explains the well-endowed blond from Saturday night…"

Of course, Maura did hear and wasn't exactly happy to know this fact. Still, she supposed couldn't exactly get angry; she had been on a date Friday night that was apparently the catalyst for all this. Instead of commenting, she began cleaning up the apartment.

"Whoa, what are you doing?" Jane asked.

"Cleaning," Maura stated, looking up to see an incredulous look on Jane's face. "What? I, for one, cannot believe it's such a mess. I know you tend to let things slide a little more when you have a tough case, but it hasn't been so bad since-" _you were shot._

The end of the sentence was hanging between them. Jane knew it was the truth; even when Maura had been gone she found herself cleaning more often than not. Her eyes wandered over the apartment, to empty beer bottles and forgotten clothes and food cartons that may or may not have food still in them that was probably growing mold by now.

"Yeah…" she breathed, letting Maura know she understood what she meant. She watched Maura for a few seconds before helping her.

_**By ten o'clock**_ the house looked livable by Maura's standards again and she was sprawled out on Jane's couch, her head on Jane's lap and the brunette's fingers running through her hair. It was a familiar position, though one of the more intimate ones, and it made Maura smile.

"What's got you grinning now?" Jane asked.

"This, our position," Maura told her. Jane hummed to see if she'd go on. "Do you realize we've been familiar with each other in rather intimate ways without realizing it? This is one of the things that made me wonder about us in the past. I can't begin to tell you how many times I've wondered what you felt about me while we were in this position in the past."

"I usually thought nothing of it," Jane admitted. "It was comfortable and I didn't care." Maura nodded and hummed with content as she closed her eyes for a moment, soaking in the essence that is Jane before getting up and gathering her things. "Whoa, what are you doing?"

"I should be getting home," Maura answered. "It's late and I'm starting to get tired. I'd like to get home before I'm too tired to drive."

"Oh, okay." Jane's shoulders slumped, and her movements were a little sluggish as she stood to see Maura out, and the body language was not lost on the doctor.

"What is bothering you?" Maura asked.

Jane shrugged. "I was kind of hoping you would stay the night, but I guess after earlier I understand that you wouldn't."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, it's great and all that you've been cool with me having feelings for you, but you can tell me if it makes you uncomfortable. You don't have to keep acting like this," Jane mumbled, not meeting Maura's eyes.

"Why would it make me uncomfortable?" Maura asked, and then she laughed again. Jane shot her a look. "I understand now. I'm sorry, Jane, truly. You told me at that time when I laughed that I don't know social etiquette and I think we've found another flaw in my reaction earlier." She hugged Jane and kissed her on the cheek. "I love you too, Jane, with everything I am."

Jane couldn't stop the grin from erupting on her face as she brightened and then laughed. "I guess I should have known with the way you carried on before, but I didn't want to get washed up with hope and then be disappointed later when I misunderstood something."

"I'm sorry for not being clearer."

"So why are you leaving?"

Maura's cheeks colored a little. "It may seem rather odd, but I find myself wanting to go slow with this new development. And you know how I am about intercourse."

"Yeah, you like it and believe everyone should have lots of it," Jane teased her before squeezing her hand and nodding. "So we're going with the high school level of romancing? Hand holding, stolen kisses, and secret gifts?" Her smile looked almost mischievous to Maura as she nodded. "All right, old school it is then."

"You don't mind?" Maura had expected a little resistance with this admission.

"Nah, it's like… starting over in a way. We'll be skipping a few steps at some point I'm sure, but right now? I need to get back together, and we're not who we were before… that," Jane said, still not able to talk about the shooting without feeling uncomfortable.

Maura nodded. "I'm glad you share my feelings with this."

"It'll be kind of fun," Jane said, shrugging. "I'm sure once it all catches up to me later when I actually slow down to think about it, I'll groan over agreeing to this. But right now I'm digging it." Jane ran a hand through her hair. "That might be because I'm tired and you're gorgeous and I'll agree to just about anything with you."

Maura smirked. "I'll remember that, Detective."

"Ha ha. Go home before I force you to stay." The door was pulled open and with a hug, Maura was gone, leaving Jane standing in her doorway wondering if she would wake up tomorrow on her couch with the worse cramp in her neck and Maura on her lap. "Guess we'll see," she mumbled before yawning and going to bed.


	6. Chapter 6

_****_**I must admit, I've been enjoying this a little more than I had anticipated. I can't seem to stop writing more of this story and it's gaining a life all its own. You may see several fairly quick updates, even as soon as today. I've already got several more chapters done in fact, I'm just going over them to make sure that they are up to my standards.  
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**As a side note, this chapter (and the following several) will contain a lot of "insecure Jane" and may seem a little out of character for the normally strong and confident detective that we see on-screen. However, there should be plenty of fluffy Rizzles moments to help buffer.  
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**Enjoy.  
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><p><em><strong>Jane <strong>_woke up an hour before she needed to, and after rolling over to try to fall asleep again she remembered the events of yesterday and groaned, pulling the pillow over her head.

"Why did I agree to that?" she grumbled, suddenly wanting nothing more than to share coffee and breakfast with Maura at that exact moment. The pillow was pulled from her face, which now sported a thoughtful look. "Wait, it may not be exactly right now but I can still share coffee and breakfast with her." She looked at the clock again. "Maura will be in the morgue in an hour, because she's insane like that. If I stop at that ridiculously overpriced but amazingly delicious coffee shop she loves I can get us both really good coffee and one of their heavenly, to-die-for pastries that Maura will wrinkle her nose at only because she knows she can't resist eating it."

Plan in place, Jane jumped up to get in the shower. She was going to do this right, dammit!

_**When **_Maura walked into her office, she was surprised to see Jane in her chair with two coffees and a pastry bag sitting on her desk.

"I must admit, I would never have expected to see you so soon," Maura admitted with an amused smile as she approached the brunette.

Jane offered a grin and a coffee. "I'm full of surprises."

"Oh I'm aware," Maura said, taking the coffee and raising an eyebrow at her… Jane. "I'm also aware that you are sitting in my chair, and I need to have it back to get started on my morning paperwork."

"Blech." Jane made a face. "You seriously have _morning_ paperwork?"

"Sometimes, yes I do. Today's will consist of anything that the labs worked on yesterday, as well as anything that wasn't urgent but needed my attention from yesterday," Maura explained. Jane winced and looked away. Maura, realizing how that might have made Jane feel, sat on her lap to kiss her cheek. "You aren't responsible for my workload this morning, Jane, I am. And I'm glad I chose to go find you yesterday morning instead of waiting for the end of the workday. Who knows how long you would've stayed on the roof if I hadn't, and I doubt we'd have made as much progress as we've made."

"I still feel responsible. If you hadn't had to come find me, you wouldn't have so much to catch up on," Jane mumbled, not meeting Maura's eyes.

Maura huffed. "All right, fine, if you want to feel responsible for it then do so. But, you will not sulk about it in my chair. If you feel the need to sulk, go to the couch where I can keep an eye on you until you realize that _you_ outrank _this_," she motioned to the mess of paperwork on her desk, "any day and any time." She stood and crossed her arms, waiting for Jane to react. It would be an understatement to say she was surprised when Jane stood and walked over to the couch.

Not sure how to act now, Maura stood there for a moment before picking up Jane's coffee and taking it to the brunette, sitting with her.

"You know, Jane, you're allowed to put up some resistance," she said softly, handing over the coffee. Jane took it with a shrug and stared at it a moment.

"Why do you feel so strongly for me?" Jane asked sullenly, voice heavy with emotion. She winced at the words she hadn't meant to say out loud, but followed through with her other thoughts before Maura could answer. "You're… God, you're such an amazing person, Maura, inside and out. Even when I'm screaming at you, you're still there when I break down. And me, I'm so broken and damaged…"

Maura's chest tightened as she heard, for the first time, the depth of Jane's insecurities and instantly put her arms around her. "Right now, I can see that you are. But you're also strong and stubborn, and I'll be here to help you heal every time, just like you've always been there when I've needed you."

Jane leaned into Maura, twisting so she had her head on the woman's shoulder and her face was buried into her neck, breathing her in. "That doesn't tell me why you feel so strongly for me, why you even bother."

"I bother because I feel strongly for you," Maura admitted it, rubbing Jane's back. "You carry yourself with confidence, though you're not quite there right now. You have so many demons that have tried to bring you down, but you've always won over them in the end. You're loyal to your friends and family." She paused to kiss Jane's head. "You have a lot of positive traits, Jane.

"But I think it's been our interaction that is what made me fall for you, because although we don't seem to have anything in common we get along so well it's uncanny. We've seen each other at our worst and yet we're still here, still friends at the least and working on discovering what else we can be. I haven't scared you off with my irrelevant babble and strange quirks. You haven't managed to scare me off with… well, you." Jane snorted at that, muttering something about how that was insulting. "The point is that if you were to be completely eradicated from my life I would feel empty. I've already proven that I could live without you, and that I am better for having known you, but no one can replace you and I don't even want to be faced with the need to try. And if the way you've dealt with my absence in the last few months is any indicator, I'd say you wouldn't want to be without me either."

"Damn straight," Jane grumbled. She knew she should probably move, and was sure that Maura was getting uncomfortable, but she wasn't ready to face her just yet. "If I'd known you were okay I probably wouldn't have gotten so bad, but you're right. I wouldn't have wanted anyone else but you."

Maura nodded and forced Jane to leave her sanctuary and look at her. "I'm not going to tell you to stop being so unsure of yourself, because you can't just turn off those insecurities at the drop of a dime. But, I do want you to let me help you overcome them. I want you to promise that if you ever feel overwhelmed you'll come to me and I promise we'll work through them. Can you promise me that?"

"I can promise to try," Jane said, earning a soft smile.

"I'll take that for now," Maura agreed. "Now, I'm sure both of our coffees are cold, as are the pastries. It's still early enough so why don't we go across the street to that diner and eat? I'll even let you have something completely unhealthy for you."

Jane smirked. "Can I get that in writing?"

_**Jane **_walked into the bullpen late because she'd stayed with Maura even after they came back from breakfast just because she could. When she sat down with a fresh cup of gourmet coffee, because she convinced Maura to let her replace the ones from this morning before they went back, she greeted Frost and Korsak with a grin.

"I'd ask if you had another good weekend, but from what I heard your Monday morning sucked," Frost said. "What, did Maura come over last night and nurse you back to health?"

"Something like that," Jane answered with a smirk. When she saw the shock on their faces, she frowned. "Jeez, have I been that bad?" She paused. "No, don't answer that."

Korsak cleared his throat. "Are you really doing better now, Janie? I mean, it's been pretty topsy-turvy with you since the Doc came back."

Jane shrugged. "One day at a time."

Anything else they were going to say about it was put on hold. They were called for a crime scene.

_**It was**_ a little after midnight when Jane walked into her apartment, eyes burning from the need for sleep. The good news was that the case was solved and the bad guy booked. With a yawn, she caught the smell of something delicious and realized the oven was keeping something warm and the kitchen light was still on. Glancing around, she noticed a pair of heels by the door and the hall light was on.

"Maura…" she murmured with a smile. Her stomach actually wanted food now that she could smell it, so she opened the oven and got out the glass pan that looked like it held baked pasta within it. Setting it on the stove, she lifted the foil to find that she was right. To the left of the stove, she found a note.

'_Come wake me, we'll eat together.'_

It was typical Maura, and Jane found herself chuckling as she went to get the woman from the bedroom. Pushing the door open gently, she admired the sight of Maura hugging her pillow dressed just in one of her jerseys.

"God, she's gorgeous," she whispered, eyes wandering over the bare skin. Maura hadn't bothered to pull on the blanket; she must have thought Jane wouldn't be so late. Unable to keep her distance, Jane walked over to the bed and let her fingertips slide up a bare leg, amazed to see goose bumps and then, when she reached the hip, a full body shiver.

"You're home," Maura whispered sleepily, smiling at Jane. "Enjoying yourself?"

Jane chuckled and bent down to kiss her nose. "Yes I am, to both questions." She burrowed her face in Maura's hair and inhaled before kissing her temple. "I found your note, and if you still want to eat with me I am kind of hungry."

"I do want to," Maura said. Jane straightened up, and watched Maura stretch her body before getting up. "No beer or coffee this late, though, all right?" Jane nodded dutifully and let Maura lead her back to the kitchen. When she tried to help Maura prepare plates, she got smacked and told to sit at the counter. Laughing, Jane did as she was told and studied her friend.

She frowned. "Can we still say we're only friends?"

Maura tilted her head in thought. "No probably not. But are you really ready to label this as something more?"

She hadn't thought about it, honestly. "I'm not sure." A plate, fork, and glass of water were sat in front of her and she waited until Maura was sitting with the same three items before digging in. "Part of me wants to, because calling you my friend just doesn't feel… strong enough. Still, I don't think we're ready to be… girlfriends yet." Though as she tested out statements where she would call Maura her girlfriend, she couldn't help but smile at the idea.

Maura nodded, though from her smile Jane could tell she was pleased at the prospect of being able to use that title in the future. "We're working on it, Jane, and I think we'll get there soon enough. For now, though, let's just stick to what we have."

Jane nodded. When they finished eating, she set the dishes in the sink and all but dragged Maura to bed, where she changed quickly and fell in next to the doctor and pulled her into her arms for the night.

"We may be less than girlfriends, but we're still more than friends," Jane murmured as she closed her eyes, not really needing to justify her action but wanting to, "so I think I'm entitled to extra cuddly cuddling."

Maura giggled and kissed the hollow of Jane's neck as she tucked her head under Jane's chin. "You won't hear me complaining. I love being in your arms."

They both fell asleep with a smile on their face.


	7. Chapter 7

**And here's another chapter for y'all. I've got up to chapter 10 written and it's still coming. I may get chapter 8 up tonight as well, but I want to give it another read through first.  
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**I am bringing in a character for this chapter that will be referred to in the next two chapters as well to help push Jane's insecurities regarding the duo's relationship just a little further. Part of me feels a little unsure of Jane's personality in this chapter, but I think it wasn't portrayed too badly.  
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**Enjoy.  
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><p><em><strong>It had <strong>_turned out to be the weekend from hell, Jane decided as she collapsed on the couch Tuesday morning. She didn't even care if she made it to the bed or not. And the worst part of the weekend was that Maura had been called away to D.C. and Jane had to make do with a couple rushed phone calls and no known return time.

"Damn Feds," she growled as she curled up. Then, with a sigh, she got up. "Fuck this I'm going to Maura's. If I'm gonna end up passing out on a couch, it's gonna be a comfy one!" Grabbing some things, Jane left her apartment again.

_**There **_was an unknown vehicle with rental tags in the driveway, making Jane bristle with caution and anger as she parked and grabbed her bag. Walking up to the door, she contemplated whether she should knock or not until she decided if Maura happened to be home, and she was going to sulk over not being called if she was, it would be impolite of her to walk in unannounced if she had a guest over, which was the only explanation for the unknown car.

So she knocked, only to have the door answered by not Maura.

"Hello," Jane told Ian with a growl.

"Ah, Jane, it's good to see you. I'm afraid Maura's not here at the moment," Ian told her, though he moved to let her in.

"I'm well aware of that," Jane told him, moving to the living room so that she could collapse on the couch with a grunt. "What are you doing here if you know she's not here?"

"I called her when I arrived last night, and she told me how to get in."

Jane made a mental note to make sure Maura changed her security codes, and anything else she could think of that could keep Ian out in the future.

"I'm surprised to see you here, actually. Maura mentioned a falling out when I saw her a couple months ago; though I don't know much about it I'm afraid."

Jane made some noise to let him know she heard, and Ian seemed to get the message because he mentioned something about a few more hours of sleep and disappeared upstairs to, she presumed, Maura's room. Her eyes were closed, but she couldn't summon sleep anymore knowing that Ian was here.

"Fuck," she growled, grabbing her bag and going to the guest room as she grabbed her phone and called Maura. She heard a sleepy hello and felt a little bad for waking her, but then remembered Ian. "Sorry to wake you, but I found an Ian in your house."

"Oh God," Maura said, sounding very awake now. "I was going to call you, but I knew you were busy with the case. He's there for supplies and then he'll be gone, Jane."

"So don't do anything rash," Jane growled, knowing that was what Maura wasn't saying. When she didn't hear anything, she knew she was right. "Fine, I'll be… hospitable."

"If it makes you feel better, I will be getting on a plane in a couple of hours and I'll be home soon," Maura told her.

"I want to tell you that I don't care if you ever come back," Jane mumbled as she sank into the guest bed, "especially since Ian has decided he has liberties with your room." Maura made a noise that couldn't bode well for the man, and Jane smiled. "However, I can't wait to see you again. It's been a horrible time without you now that I've gotten used to having you around again."

Jane could hear Maura's smile as she said, "I've missed you too, Jane."

"Good. Hurry home, okay?"

"I will." Jane was about to hang up, but she heard Maura yawn out an "I love you, Jane" before she could. "I love you too, Maura. Call me when you land, whether you need a ride or not."

"Get some sleep," Maura told her with a laugh. "I'll be sure to call."

Maura hung up first, so Jane ended the call as well and set the phone off to the side. She stared at it for a moment before glancing at the door to the rest of the house with a frown. She knew Maura wasn't lying when she said she loved her, or that she was going to call her. And it was just like Maura to not want to call and interrupt a case. But this was Ian, and he mentioned them seeing each other during the other woman's time away from home.

"It won't do me any good worrying now," Jane told herself before rolling over and closing her eyes. She couldn't smell Maura on this bed, because Maura hasn't slept in here for a long time, and it bothers her enough that she turns over and stares at the phone again. "I can't bother her now."

If anything, she'll make Maura come back here and lay down with her for a nap when she came home.

_**The nap**_ never happened, because when Maura came home she was faced with two Rizzoli's and Ian all standing there in some kind of stalemate.

"Should I ask?" Maura asked. Ian broke free first, smiling at her and stepping towards her. Maura raised a hand and looked at Jane and Angela. Jane broke next, and Maura had hoped she would also greet her with a smile but was disappointed. No matter, she could fix that, she decided, hanging up her jacket and walking over to Jane to wrap her arms around her. She felt the brunette tense up for a moment before giving in. "Now, can you tell me what's going on?"

"When you called to say you were on your way home from the airport, Ma was coming in so I told her you were gonna be home soon. She wanted to make a big early dinner and get my brother's over here to welcome you home," Jane explained, though her voice lacked any enthusiasm. "Ian told us we didn't have to, because we were guests, and he'd take care of it so we didn't have to bother."

"I see…" Maura said before turning to Ian. "The Rizzoli's are family, Ian. If anyone is a guest it is you." She looked at Angela, who was grinning like a fool at the sight of the two girls hugging. "Angela, I think having an early dinner would be lovely."

"I'll get started right away, then," Angela said, shooting Ian a look that told him to get out of the kitchen, which he did quickly. "Janie, why don't you help Maura get her luggage upstairs and unpacked, hm?"

Jane nodded, though Maura saw the look of distaste she had when she turned to get the suitcases. Maura took the small carry on, because it was the only thing Jane would let her carry, and led the way to her room. She was glad the bed was made, though she was quick to take the bag Ian had left at the foot of the bed downstairs and to the guest room, ignoring Ian's look as she walked back upstairs with Jane's bag to find Jane sitting in the lounge chair in the corner.

"Do I need to buy a completely new bed?" Maura asked her softly, half joking to try and get Jane to smile a little as she pulled off the bedding to put on a clean set. As fragile as their relationship was, she wasn't going to do anything to compromise it.

"No," Jane answered, watching her. "He said you two had run into each other while you were away."

"We did, for a little while. I was actually surprised when I found myself wanting to move on rather than stay with him. It was nice to see a familiar face after so long, though, that I hesitated to leave," Maura admitted. Jane grunted, still unwilling to shift her mindset, and Maura chose to leave it be while she took the sheets to the laundry room, a little glad that it was accomplished without being seen since Ian was being put to work by the elder Rizzoli.

When she walked back into the bedroom, Jane had gotten out her spare bed sheets and had started putting them on the bed. Maura moved in to help immediately.

"I'm sorry for not telling you immediately," Maura said softly.

"Don't be," Jane mumbled. "It's not your fault I decided to come by at five in the morning, or whatever time it was that early in the morning. I don't know when he came in, but you are always self-conscious about calling me when I'm waist deep in a case and close to cracking it so it doesn't surprise me that you didn't call."

"Still-" Maura stopped when Jane shot her a look, and looked away ashamed. When she felt Jane's arms around her, she relaxed and leaned into her.

"Look, I'm an idiot and still a little shaky about pretty much everything when it comes to you. It's not your fault and I'm trying to deal with it," Jane told her. "Besides, don't think I didn't see how you handled everything down there before. You made sure to keep him at a distance and came to me, though I was afraid you weren't going to at first even if you did make him stay back."

Maura looked up at Jane, trying to decide what part of Jane's statements to attack first. She decided to start from the beginning. "Jane, you're not an idiot. Or, if you are, then you're _my_ idiot and I wouldn't change you. And to be honest, I'm still insecure about all this as well, because I'm afraid that I'm going to do something that will trigger another relapse with you and I'll end up losing you for good. As for what happened downstairs… I'm only disappointed that I didn't move to you sooner."

Jane hummed and kissed Maura's temple. "You're really too good to me."

"Yes, but I could honestly say the same about you. Though, right now it's a little shaky," she teased with a wink and a bump at the waist. Jane chuckled and slowly pulled away, only for Maura to turn and step forward, arms lazily going to Jane's shoulders and around her neck as she pushed herself against her. "Jane, you don't doubt that I love you, do you?"

Jane sighed and shrugged, hands going to Maura's waist. "A little, sometimes… I'm still struggling with the idea that you could love me, you know?"

"I thought so," Maura said. "Would you mind if I kissed you?" Jane shook her head, and tilted her head down as though to meet Maura halfway and Maura wasted no time in closing the distance. She kept the kiss soft and explorative, not wanting Jane to feel pressured with it. But after a couple seconds, she felt Jane add more pressure to her lips and her arms pulling her closer, pulling a moan from her.

That seemed to scare Jane a little, because she ended the kiss and lifted her head. They kept their physical proximity though, and Maura used that to study Jane's expression, which looked almost surprised.

"Jane?"

"Wow, Maura…" Jane whispered. "Fuck, why haven't we done that before?" Maura, having not been expecting that response, giggled. "Hey, it's not funny!" Jane exclaimed, even as she grinned. "I love you. And I want to do that again later, but as much as I don't like Ian I wouldn't leave him to my mother alone for hours."

"It would be rude to lock ourselves away while there are others here," Maura agreed. "Though, when your family leaves later tonight I wouldn't say no to locking ourselves away." She was awarded another chuckle as they pulled away. "I love your smile, Jane."

"Then, hopefully someday it will be a little more permanent," Jane commented. "Shall we go face the lions?"


	8. Chapter 8

**One more chapter update for today. This chapter is mostly just for kicks, as most of this is just development and a little fun. It has a little nudity, but I don't feel that there is enough reference to anything explicit enough to warrant a higher rating.**

**Also, I don't really know much about basketball. The little bit that talks about basketball is probably not really all that likely to happen, but the conversation they have is a little humorous so I kept it. It's fiction so why not?  
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**Enjoy.  
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><p><em><strong>Jane <strong>_was sitting on the couch rubbing Bass's shell with a socked foot watching a basketball game that she wasn't really interested in since the Celtics weren't playing tonight, because Maura kicked her out of the kitchen during clean up after splashing her with the spray nozzle on the sink. As punishment for laughing, Frankie was volunteered to help with the dishes in her stead, which Jane found pretty funny.

"So, you and the turtle again," Tommy joked as he sat next to her.

"Tortoise," Ian said from the chair before Jane could, causing her to fight off the scowl that she wanted to let free. Still, she did promise to be civil with him before she and Maura left the bedroom earlier. After all, the guy got booted to the guest room and still didn't know why, while Jane knew she was being treated to special treatment later- namely a soak in the large tub with Maura and a massage, which was her price (or reward) for being civil. Maura had been hesitant about bathing together, but Jane promised no funny business and she agreed.

"_First inappropriate touch, though, and I'm kicking you out of the bedroom," Maura warned._

_Jane pouted but nodded her agreement._

"_All right, then, I'll agree to the bath too. But only if you're civil, Jane, I mean it!"_

"_I promise, babe, really."_

It helped that Tommy was more than disrespectful of the guy for her, she decided as her younger brother frowned at him. "Yeah, I know. I was messing with Janie. She and that thing get along really well now, it's kind of weird."

"You didn't get along with Bass before, Jane?" Ian asked, his tone undefinable.

"Nah, but we're cool now. We eat strawberries together when Maura's not looking, and watch sports together," Jane told him, grinning down at Bass before reaching down and scratching under his chin, his eyes blinking as though happy with the treatment.

"You only think I'm not looking," Maura piped in with an amused smile, walking around the couch to sit with Jane and handing her a beer before putting her now free hand on her thigh. Frankie sat down in the other chair after handing Tommy a beer, and Angela announced she was going to go home for some evening reading, telling Frankie and Tommy to be sure to leave soon before they outstayed their welcome. Once the door closed, Maura smiled at the two boys. "You don't have to rush out of here. I'm sure you would like to see the end of the game."

"Thanks, Maura," Tommy said. "It's not the Celtics, but these guys play the Celtics next week. It'd be nice to see what kind of team they're gonna be up against."

"Which team is it that they play?" Maura asked.

"The Cavaliers," Jane answered. "They're ahead by six for now, but we're only halfway through so it could go either way. I'm actually pretty surprised they're not doing better than this, given the hype they've been getting with other game wins."

"Yeah, this game is closer than they were predicting it'd be," Frankie added.

"So the Raptors are the red and black ones right?"

"Drinking beer and watching sports," Ian commented, a little put off. "When did this start up?"

Maura smiled at him. "A couple of years ago, because Jane watches quite a few teams, and I have learned that it is a very essential ritual to have at least one beer for sporting events." Jane laughed and stretched an arm across the back of the couch behind Maura. She caught Frankie's eye and raised an eyebrow, but he grinned and tipped his bottle before turning back to the game. Maura leaned in against Jane as she looked back at the TV to see that the cheerleaders for the home team were dancing.

"Wow, would you look at that," Tommy commented. "That redhead there in the middle sure is something."

"I don't know," Frankie said, getting in on it. "The black chick in the back looks pretty good."

Jane snorted. "You guys are both blind. The blond with the up-do off to the right that they just tossed up in the air is totally hotter than both your choices by far." Her brothers laughed, and Jane's eyes widened as she realized what she'd said, looking down at Maura to find her looking quite amused. Feeling Jane's eyes on her, she looked up and smiled, winking before looking back at the game.

"I personally find the male cheerleader in the middle to have extraordinary musculature that I'm sure suits his profession very well," Maura commented. "Though, I'm sure that none of you will agree with me. He is definitely not Jane's type, for one, and the three of you," she said, motioning to the boys, "would definitely not find him quite as delectable I'm sure."

The three siblings cracked up at that, and even Ian joined in a little, seemingly amused by their antics.

_**It was**_ a little after ten when Frankie and Tommy left, and Jane was getting some water while Maura and Ian cleaned up the beer bottles that had accumulated on the coffee table. Jane watched them, leaning against the counter as she drank her water.

"Will you be leaving soon as well, Jane?" Ian asked.

"Oh, no, Jane will be staying here tonight," Maura answered, catching him off guard. Jane hid her smirk by lifting the glass for another drink.

"Ah, I see," was Ian's response to that before he turned to kiss Maura, getting the cheek when she moved her head, and then heading for the guest room. Jane stared at Maura to avoid glaring at his back. Maura shifted nervously under her gaze.

"I'm sorry," Maura murmured, thinking the stare was because of her actions.

"No," Jane said, earning a confused look. "It's one of those weird foreign things to kiss on the cheek, so that's not a problem. You deflected his aim for the lips, so it's cool. I was just trying not to glare at his back because I'd hate to ruin my reward only moments before I am able to get it." Maura laughed and started upstairs. Jane put down her glass and followed her.

Before they could even turn on the water, though, both phones were ringing.

Maura took one look at Jane and sighed; it was obvious she hadn't gotten any sleep since they'd talked on the phone this morning. Still, they couldn't ignore the call.

_**It was**_ a pretty standard murder, and Frost had it all but solved before Jane even got to the crime scene so as soon as the scene was processed, Maura drove Jane back to the house and tried to put her to bed.

"I was promised a bath and massage," Jane said with a tired grin. Maura shot her a glare, not wanting to give in because she knew Jane needed the rest. "All right then if you don't want me to cash in both how about just the bath for tonight?"

"Jane…"

"Maura…"

They stared each other down, Jane with humor and Maura with determination. Just as Jane was about to back down, Maura sighed and turned to the bathroom to start filling the bath, making Jane wonder if she should feel triumphant for out staring Maura or not. After a few minutes, Jane was shoved into the bathroom and told to get into the tub, and Maura would be back in a minute to join her.

Shrugging, Jane stripped and got into the warm water. She leaned back and sighed as she felt her muscles loosen up. When the door opened, she peeked out of one eye to find Maura walking over to the tub in all her naked glory and, Jane was pleased to see when her eyes managed to look that high, a faint blush on her face.

"What's with the extra color on your cheeks?" Jane teased with her voice low. She saw Maura shiver before she slipped into the water and lean back against Jane, the detective's arms immediately wrapping themselves around her. "You're beautiful, Maura."

Maura looked over her shoulder and smiled, though she still held a little color on her cheeks. "So are you, Jane." She watched the brunette's gaze fall to her right side. "I know you're still insecure about it. I won't ask you to show me your body until you're comfortable."

"That's why you had me get in first," Jane said, meeting Maura's eyes as she realized how much Maura thought about her.

"Yes," Maura answered. "I don't want you to think it's because I don't want to see you, though, because I do. I just don't want you to be uncomfortable with me seeing you. When I see all of you for the first time, it will be because you are confident in my love for you and your willingness to trust me not to turn away."

Jane let her chin rest on Maura's shoulder. "Thanks. Just hearing you say that… Just, thank you."

Maura hummed and relaxed against Jane, closing her eyes and soaking in her presence as well as the water's warmth. Her eyes popped open, though, when she felt Jane's fingertips drawing on her abdomen a few minutes later. She shot the brunette a look.

"What? I'm not doing anything inappropriate."

"No, I suppose not…" Maura said, inspecting Jane's face for the intent to cross that line. They would need to get out soon anyway, since the water was losing its warmth.

And then she felt Jane's hands on her chest, giving her breasts an experimental squeeze and making her jump in surprise before shooting Jane a glare and getting out, wrapping a towel around her body and leaving the bathroom without a word or glance.

"Maura… Come on, you know I was just teasing!" Jane called before groaning and getting out as well. She dried off before realizing in her haste she hadn't brought in a change of clothes. She hesitated a moment before wrapping up and walking out of the bathroom. She didn't see Maura, and after a glance realized she had disappeared into the closet to change so Jane dug into her bag and dressed quickly.

"Are you decent, Jane?"

"Yeah, I'm good." Maura emerged from the closet and walked over to her side of the bed to slide in next to Jane. "Hey, you're not, you know, mad about that are you?"

Maura shook her head and smiled, patting the bed to show Jane she wouldn't be kicked out of the bed tonight. "I suppose I should feel flattered that you want to touch me. However, I want you to touch me and… I'd like to keep that locked up a little longer, because I know you aren't ready for that."

Jane sighed, understanding what Maura meant. "Sorry, babe." Though, as she snuggled up next to Maura, she wondered how long they could both hold out. As nice as holding Maura was, now that Jane had seen and felt her, the thoughts now had a little experience to add to them. She felt her cheeks warm, as well as a few other areas.

Who was she kidding, she really just wanted to touch Maura's boobs again, because they were amazing.

She took a deep breath to push those feelings aside and kissed Maura's shoulder.

Maura hummed. "Now, sleep. We have to be up in about six hours to get to work."

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><p><strong>I tried to be a little playful there between the two of them, but I don't think I portrayed the situation very well. What do you think?<strong>


	9. Chapter 9

**I'm not going to lie, part of me just wants to take the two in this universe, lock them up in a closet and not let them out until they've worked out all the tension between them. But that wouldn't be much of a story.**

**Anyway, this chapter is part of why I feel that way, but it's not all slow.**

**Thank you guys so much for all the feedback. It's amazing how many people have put this on alert. I never thought I'd get such a strong following for this piece, because it's really just an experimental foot into the fandom and I'm overjoyed that even one person enjoys it, let alone the dozens of you that have been reading. Again, thank you so so much.  
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**Enjoy.  
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><p><em><strong>Jane <strong>_walked into the morgue to see Maura for no other reason than just because she could, since she was still very aware of Ian's presence in the other woman's house and it was still bothering her. Walking into the autopsy room, she grinned at the sight of the M.E. with her hands in a dead guy. She had missed this, in a grim and slightly disturbing way given the dead guy.

"Hello, Jane," Maura greeted her, lifting her head to offer her a smile. "I'll be done in a moment."

"Take your time," Jane told her, sitting on the counter just because she could. "Have you heard from Ian today?" She hadn't wanted to talk about it, but the silence was starting to make her nervous.

"Yes. We've been coordinating over text so that I know what to order for his supplies," Maura answered, turning to grab a different tool and then back at the body. As she stood to get the organs to put back in, she glanced over at the brunette to see her sitting there a little awkwardly. "Would you feel better if I showed you the messages?"

"No, not really," Jane admitted. "I trust you, though I won't lie and say that the fact that I know you can't lie has nothing to do with that." She frowned. "Though that statement could honestly be one of your not-telling-me-everything statements… but I don't think you'd do that in this situation."

"I wouldn't," Maura admitted, turning back to the body as she started putting it back together as much as she was possible. "I know how you feel about Ian being here right now, and I wouldn't hide anything about this situation from you."

Jane made a noise, not sure how to respond to that. Sure she believed Maura, but anything she would say would just put more light on even more insecurities, and Jane figured she'd been insecure enough for a while.

"Would you like to go get something for lunch when I finish this?" Maura asked. Jane wanted to say yes, but she felt too raw right now to do something so normal for "friend Maura and Jane" and jumped from the counter.

"Nah, I'll grab a sandwich from the café and get back to work," Jane told her. Maura nodded, not really surprised by the answer despite her hopes that she would hear otherwise. "But, maybe we could go out tonight, just the two of us?"

"Oh, yes!" Maura agreed quickly. Feeling her cheeks warm, she cleared her throat to calm down. "Detective, are you asking me on a date?" she teased.

Jane grinned. "Maybe I am. Guess you'll just have to see." She walked over to kiss Maura's forehead before heading for the door. "I'll come get you at seven, okay? If Boston doesn't kill anyone between now and then, I think you can get ready by then."

_**Of course,**_ Jane decided with a scowl, Boston couldn't let her give the best woman in town a night out without being called in for a dead body. She had just left the apartment to go get Maura when the call came in, and despite the pantsuit she was wearing being the nicest thing she owned she didn't feel like changing and drove straight to the crime scene.

She was amused to see Maura also decked out for the now ruined evening together when she arrived, and made sure to appreciate the way she looked.

"I'm sorry our evening has been put on hold," Maura told her as they crossed paths.

Jane grinned. "If anything, we'll be the fanciest two people at the 24-hour diner when we leave here." The two shared a chuckle before getting to work.

Unfortunately, Jane wasn't able to meet Maura for a quick bite before heading in to the precinct because of some witnesses and an unexpected visitor to the scene that needed questioning. Not wanting to head home just yet, since she had expected an evening out with the detective and didn't look forward to facing Ian instead, Maura chose to go down to the morgue and change to start working on the autopsy.

If Jane had to work on this case already, Maura could certainly do what she could to help as soon as possible.

_**The next**_ time Jane saw Maura was two days later when the M.E. showed up in her apartment an hour after she had gotten home and had collapsed on the couch with a cold beer after a long shower.

"Have you eaten?" was the first thing out of Maura's mouth as she closed the door behind her.

"Not yet, but I haven't really felt hungry yet," Jane admitted. She was a little upset because of the lack of communication between the two. Phone calls had been limited to information about the case and quick check-ins from Maura making sure Jane was taking care of herself. To top things off, Ian hadn't left yet and he was starting to become a thorn in Jane's side. The idea that he's probably gotten it in his head that he's still the love of Maura's life and he doesn't want to leave until she gives in to him was stuck in her mind and wouldn't leave.

Maura seemed to sense Jane's melancholy and put in an order to their favorite Thai place before making Jane lay face down on the couch. "This really isn't the ideal position for this," she said as she started giving Jane a rub down, "but I don't want to put you to bed until you've eaten something."

"You've worked as hard as I have, Maura, you don't need to do this," Jane told her even as she closed her eyes and gave in to the pleasure she felt from the doctor's hands, which gave way to a slew of images about other things the woman could do with her hands and, combined with a well-placed push on her back, ushered a low moan from her. "God, Maura, you're awesome, you know that?"

"I have been informed a few times," Maura teased, "and most of those times have been from you I believe."

"Good, I don't really want to think about the other people that tell you you're awesome after you make them feel as good as I feel right now," Jane tossed back, rolling her shoulders and getting up to pull Maura into her lap. "It seems almost silly, but I've missed you."

Maura settled in on Jane's lap and leaned her head against Jane's. "It's not silly, Jane. We've communicated, yes, but there hasn't really been any interaction between us over the last couple of days. I've missed you as well." Jane made a noise that Maura couldn't identify, and then felt a kiss on her collarbone. "How have you been dealing with everything?"

"By 'everything' you mean the Ian thing, don't you," Jane mumbled against her skin, making Maura shiver almost unnoticed. "I'm trying not to let it bother me, even though I haven't been there to keep an eye on him. But, I'm trying to trust you and not let it control me. Lord knows I want nothing more than to storm into your house, load up his shit and tell him to get the fuck out."

Maura smiled; that would be typical Jane behavior, and a small part of her would be overjoyed if the scene were to be played out. But, she didn't want Jane to do anything of that nature despite her feelings on the matter. There was still protocol to keep in mind, and she did try to support Ian's efforts since they were noble.

"How much more stuff is he waiting on?"

"From what he said, there should only be one more shipment arriving and then he can start arranging for it to be taken to the airport for transport," Maura told her. "I'm hoping he'll be gone by this weekend, as neither of us on on-call, I checked, and I want us to spend the weekend out of town without anything to distract us."

"Why Dr. Isles, do you plan on seducing me?" Jane joked. Maura rolled her eyes, and playfully smacked the detective on the shoulder. Jane twisted so that Maura slid backwards from her lap and onto the couch, leaning over her. "When he leaves, would I be too obnoxious if I asked you to have the security code changed? And anything else that needs changed to make sure he can't just waltz in later?"

"No. If it will make you feel better, I'll even change the locks," Maura answered.

"I don't think that's necessary, but I appreciate the thought." She leaned in to kiss Maura on the lips, tentatively at first and then growing more confident. Just as she was really giving in to the sensation, she was jolted back by a knock at the door. "Dammit…"

_**They were**_ getting into bed when Maura brought it up, though Jane hadn't even been aware of it until she mentioned it.

"Are you frightened by the idea of us being together still?" Maura asked, seeing Jane tense up. "I'm not upset really, I'm just a little concerned because you have been doing well so far with the more intimate touching when around others but you seemed to mind earlier with the possibility of being caught kissing. We both know that knock could have been your mother, and that was the thought running through your mind before you remembered that we ordered food."

Jane nodded. "I don't get it to be honest, Maura. I want to kiss you, I want to touch you. Hell, I want to love you in every way possible. And God knows I hear enough from the guys that it really doesn't, or at least shouldn't, bother me for them to know and outside of them and my family who cares what the general consensus is?" Jane ran a hand through her hair watching Maura slide into bed, patting the space beside her. She just stared at it. "I don't know what's going on in my head right now."

"I think I understand," Maura said. "I don't mind going at your pace, Jane. You're still holding on to a lot of feelings, and with Ian still here you seem a lot more reserved than usual."

She watched as Jane's face melted into serenity. "How the hell can you put up with me?"

"I love you, that's how. Now, come to bed."


	10. Chapter 10

**I'm trying to get you guys caught up with me. I've got one more chapter I'm gonna edit a little more and then it'll be up, and then we'll all be caught up with each other. I've been working on the latest chapter but it's really fighting me. Hell, I'm not even sure I like this one or the next one, but I'll let you guys be the judge of that. This is what my head spit out, and other than a few changes that's what you guys are getting.**

**Enjoy.  
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><p><em><strong>The day<strong>_ Ian left, Jane walked into the bullpen after lunch with the biggest grin anyone had ever seen on her for a long time, even after Maura had come back. The few people in the room took note of the grin and the relaxed posture of the detective, but chose not to comment on it. And if they had, Jane ignored them.

"Guys, I'm skipping town this weekend and nothing short of Hell breaking loose is going to bring me down," Jane announced to her two partners, who weren't sure how to respond. "In fact, I think I'll leave an hour early today just to get ready."

That pulled Korsak out of his funk. "Who the hell are you, and where did you put Jane Rizzoli?"

"Seriously, man, you look like… like…"

"Whoa, who's got you in a good mood?" Frankie asked as he walked in, looking Jane over.

Jane shrugged, the grin never leaving her face as she got a glint in her eye. "Dr. Isles has very wonderful hands," she commented, causing jaws to drop at every turn. "I've never felt so relaxed in all my life." At the gawks, she added, "Come on, it was a massage! Sheesh, just because we sleep together doesn't mean we have sex, though I'm sure that we'd have amazing sex and you all are just jealous because she'll be doing it with me."

"Whoa, you and the Doc are together?" Frost asked. Before Jane could comment, he added, "Damn, I thought I was going to have to intervene and send her a flower with your name on it to get things rolling."

That made Jane pause. "What are you talking about?"

"You and the Doc," Frost said, watching as Jane's eyes narrowed a little more. "Jeez, Jane, it's been obvious from the day you set eyes on her that you've had a thing for her. I don't blame you, either. She is a fine looking woman."

"Yeah…" Jane agreed off-handedly as she thought about what Frost had said. "You really thought I'd had eyes for her since day one?" Frost nodded. "Well I'll be damned…"

"I must admit, if I didn't have some idea before I would've definitely thought you did after she left," Korsak added. "I've never seen you so messed up, and you've been through some shitty stuff."

Jane hummed and looked at her desk for a reason to go see Maura before just jumping up and going to the elevator. No one was going to stop her, she reminded herself, because if they really cared about her just up and going down to the morgue at various times during the day they'd have stopped her a thousand times before.

The elevator opened to the morgue and Jane sauntered into the office, surprising Maura as she fell onto the couch with a confident grin that she hadn't seen at that magnitude for a long time.

"To whom do I owe the pleasure of your company?" Maura asked, confused. "I doubt you're here without a reason. Are the guys giving you a hard time again? Or are you waiting for some test results? I'm pretty sure-"

"None of the above," Jane answered. "There isn't anything pressing for me to do right now, and I really just wanted to see you for the mere fact that I could."

Maura raised an eyebrow even as she smiled. "Well, you'll be seeing me in a few hours, as well as all weekend."

"Yes, but watching you work is fascinating. You make these really cute faces when you're concentrating really hard. Actually, you always make cute faces," Jane amended, pleased by the color on Maura's cheeks at the compliment.

"I suppose I should continue working," Maura said, clearly caught off guard and avoiding Jane's eyes as she looked down at her desk again, pen upraised. "I would hate for us to leave late because I hadn't finished my paperwork."

Jane watched for about ten minutes before getting up, catching Maura's attention even as she pretended to still be focused on paperwork, and she walked over to the desk. Turning the chair to command Maura's attention, Jane cupped her cheek and pressed their lips together for a brief kiss before pulling away with a wink and walking off.

"I'll be by your place at six like we planned," she commented before leaving the office, not seeing Maura's hand come up to touch her lips.

"She's…" Maura started, trying to come up with the end to that sentence to describe what she was feeling. "God, she's just so damn sexy."

"_**You've**_ got that look on your face that says you've solved everything," Korsak said as Jane sat back down.

"Well, not everything," Jane said with a shrug, though the look stayed. "There are still a lot of things I need to work out. But, I feel better about a few things, a little more balanced, I guess."

"You wanna share with the class?" Frost asked, grinning like a fool.

Jane frowned as she considered what to say. "I'm still working on this whole… feelings thing. I mean, I'm crazy about Maura, you guys can attest to that, and I know she's just as crazy about me or she wouldn't have been putting up with my ass the last couple weeks."

"That's true," Korsak agreed. "So what are you gonna do?"

Jane shook her head. "I'm not sure. But I don't want to hold us back. If she were to leave me again, I don't think I'd come out of it."

"Sounds like you got some work to do, kid."

Jane nodded before turning to the work on her desk. "I'll say. I need to get this done in the next few hours, or I'll be leaving late tonight, and that just can't happen." That said, she hunkered down and got to work.

_**Maura**_ had reserved a room in Portland, Maine for no other reason than it was a couple hours away and near the coast. It was chilly this time of year, so they weren't going to be able to swim but they could still enjoy the coast away from home.

The hotel suite wasn't very large but it was still spacious despite the amount of furniture. There was one queen sized bed, a dresser, a TV, a small sitting area with a couple chairs and a table in the main room and then the bathroom. Jane walked in, dropped her bag, and collapsed face first onto the bed.

"Jane, you really shouldn't do that," Maura scolded her. "Let's get changed for the evening and get some rest so that we can be up early tomorrow to enjoy the day together."

Jane turned her head to look at Maura. "And if I said I wanted to go for a stroll under the stars instead?" Maura turned to regard her curiously. "The sky is actually pretty clear tonight, and it's still pretty early even by your standards," she smirked, "unless you're that anxious to get me in bed already?"

"Jane…" Maura warned, though her smile and the amused shake of her head countered the tone. "I suppose a walk would be nice and relaxing after the day's work."

As they walked, Jane took notice of the places around the hotel to see if there was anything they might enjoy doing the next day. She picked out a place that looked nice for a light lunch, and noted that there was a candy shop that would undoubtedly carry fudge clusters next to it. As they explored the next block, Jane saw a very nice restaurant Maura would certainly enjoy but that she probably didn't pack the right clothes for and frowned. She hadn't planned all that well, it seemed.

"You're being awfully quiet," Maura commented when she saw Jane frown. "Is something wrong?"

"No. I was looking around, and then realized that there were a couple really nice places to go for dinner, and I didn't pack anything appropriate."

Maura leaned into Jane's side, wrapping around her arm. "I actually have a few places in mind that I'd like to try, and none of them require anything dressier than what you would normally wear to work. Even jeans would probably be acceptable." Jane shot her a glance and chuckled. "What?"

"You take care of me way too well, Maura," Jane said. "I'm not complaining, but it's kind of hard to think about how I'm going to match that by taking care of you."

"You do take care of me," Maura told her. "Just by being with me, you do more for me than many others have ever done. And you don't just grace me with your presence; you do things for me and with me. You've suffered through embarrassing dinners with me a time or two over the years, and I've managed to drag you to a few movies and stage performances that I know you'd never have gone to otherwise. You listen to me, though I know you'll never openly admit it."

"I don't understand any of it, though," Jane commented.

"You still listen, and I know you look up some things I've talked about. I've seen your search history when I've borrowed your computer in the past," Maura pointed out, emphasizing her tease with a bump with her hip.

Jane chuckled. "Okay, so yeah, I've tried to understand what you've talked about sometimes. I'll even admit to enjoying some of those documentaries you enjoy, though only to you and if the guys catch wind of it I'll deny it."

"I would be surprised if you didn't."

Jane pulled her arm from Maura's grasp to wrap it around her, pulling her against her side. "Well, regardless of how uneven this feels sometimes, because I swear you do more for me than I do for you, thanks for being here."

"I'm only sorry I wasn't here when you needed me the most," Maura commented sadly.

"Hey, don't be sorry about that. You said yourself that you were doing some… inner self-something and didn't feel ready to come back." Jane stopped moving and made Maura look at her. "I've forgiven you, you've forgiven me. We need to move forward sometime, Maura."

Maura smiled sadly. "It seems that I've overlooked the fact that I still have some things to forgive myself for." Jane nodded and pulled Maura into a quick hug before they started walking back to the hotel. "We'll be fine, won't we?"

"Yeah, I think so. I've got to believe we will, or I'll probably be back to hanging out with Jack Daniels every night." Maura nodded. "I'm thinking hot shower, because I'm kind of chilled now, and then some cuddling under the covers."

"That sounds like a great idea."


	11. Chapter 11

_****_**And here's the other chapter, ready for your reading pleasure. I can only hope that the next chapter will be an entertaining as the last few have been. It's given me a little trouble, so if you guys have any input that would be awesome.**

**Enjoy.  
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><p><em><strong>When<strong>_ Maura finally dragged Jane out of the hotel room and they'd had something for breakfast, Jane was quick to realize that Maura had wanted to wake up so early to have prime shopping time. After an appropriate amount of whining, Maura promised Jane she could choose their lunch location and she dutifully stopped and made a show of sulking until they went into the first store.

Maura was amused when Jane went from being a little reserved as they were shopping to being fairly active with the event, and by the time they walked into a lingerie store, much to Maura's amusement, Jane was openly commenting on the items Maura was picking.

Once Maura held up a camisole in front of her and asked her opinion she found Jane quiet again, though for another reason this time.

"Jane?" The detective shook her head of whatever she was thinking, cheeks coloring. "You still haven't told me what you think?" Maura was amused, and Jane could tell. Jane cleared her throat and tried to hide a grin.

"I, uh, think you should try it on, Maura. You know, to see what it looks like."

"Hm, I suppose you're right. It won't do if I don't wear it well. This color usually looks good on me, but it wouldn't be a bad idea to see what it looks like," Maura agreed, heading for the dressing room. She opened the largest stall and pulled Jane in with her.

"Wha- Wait, why am I coming in too?" Jane asked. She wanted to see Maura in it, but she wasn't sure about seeing her change into it.

"I don't want to open the door when I change, and I'd like your opinion of how I look in it," Maura explained, pushing Jane into the chair and turning to pull off her clothes. A quick glance showed Jane trying to keep her eyes closed, but it was obvious she was fighting that urge with the stronger urge to watch. Maura pulled on the negligee and glanced in the mirror at herself before turning to Jane, eyes squeezed tight. "Jane… You can't tell me what you think with your eyes closed."

Brown eyes peeked open, and then widened. "Oh… wow…" The bottom hem was only a couple inches lower than Maura's… girl parts. Parts that Jane was very hungry for all of a sudden, she realized as she forced her eyes up only to get caught on the other girl parts, which were being very nicely showcased while still being modest. She swallowed hard. "You look… I mean, that looks _really_ good on you." Her tongue slipped out to wet her lips.

_Is it getting hot in here, or is it just me?_

Maura was amused by Jane's reaction, but that's not the only thing she felt as the brunette's gaze wandered from her chest and back down again, following the entire length of her exposed legs as well. She took a long, deep breath and turned to grab her skirt. "I think this will be a fine addition to my wardrobe, then," she said, eyes still watching Jane as she dressed. When her shirt was back on, she looked at Jane just in time to see her stand before their lips were connected, Jane's hands on her hips. The intensity of the kiss pulled a moan from her chest, and she felt Jane's tongue slip between her parted lips as her back met the wall of the stall and her arms wrapped around Jane's neck.

Air became a necessity quickly, and Jane pulled away just as quickly as she had pounced, eyes closed as she reigned herself in.

"Fuck…" Maura heard her groan. "Damn, Maura… That was hot, like really, _really_ hot."

"To which are you referring, the kiss or the camisole?" Maura teased, though she was still trying to catch her breath so the tease wasn't nearly as effective.

"Both," Jane answered before lifting her eyes and offering a smile. "We need to go back out into the public, Maura, because I want you and I am not going to have our first time together be a quick fuck in a dressing room."

Maura felt her lower abdomen coil with warmth at the idea, which fueled her to open the door and lead the way to the counter to purchase the item. Jane followed, though she kept her distance. When they were back on the sidewalk, Jane fell into step beside Maura as they began walking again.

"Where would you like to eat lunch?" Maura asked. "I'm feeling a little hungry now." Jane snorted, and looked around before deciding on a little restaurant that looked like would have some good burgers.

_**They **_were sitting about a foot away from each other at the beach on the concrete barrier between the road and the beach at this particular location, watching the colors change across the ocean as the sun disappeared behind them. They had stopped in at a theater a little while after lunch and watched a couple movies since they were offering a double feature deal, and then went to the beach to breathe in the ocean air.

"There's a steakhouse in another area of town that I thought you might enjoy for dinner," Maura said, breaking the silence. There was a tension between them that she couldn't figure out how to break. Jane could hear the strain in her voice, and felt responsible for making things difficult all of a sudden.

"Sounds good," she answered softly, trying to figure out what she could do to reassure the other woman that things were okay between them. Now that she had practically attacked Maura in the dressing room earlier she couldn't seem to calm down her hormones. She snorted, making Maura shoot her a look. "Sorry, it's just… I was just thinking about how I'm acting like a high school kid with my first girlfriend wanting to have sex but afraid to make a move, and then it occurred to me how ironic that was since we had said we were going to do the whole high school romance thing."

They laughed, and all of a sudden everything was okay again.

After a few minutes of comfortable silence just soaking in each others presence, Maura got to her feet. "Come on. Let's go to the hotel to change for dinner. If the reviews are to be believed, this steakhouse has an amazing steak, and we both know that's what you'll be eating." Jane stood and put an arm around Maura's waist. "If you're good, maybe we can make out before we sleep tonight," she continued with a wink. When Jane chuckled and kissed her forehead, Maura smiled happily. "Thanks."

"Why? I didn't do anything."

"For being yourself, and for talking to me about your feelings. If it makes you feel better, I'm just as anxious about what's happening between us. I am very ready to ravish you as well, but when we're ready for that, I'd like for it to be at home."

Jane nodded. "I think I would prefer that too."

"_**That**_ was a really good steak," Jane moaned as she leaned back in her seat, rubbing her very full stomach. Maura hummed with agreement, because she had decided on the same meal by the time they ordered. "Oh man, I don't know how I ate all that."

Maura refused the offer of a box as she handed over her card to pay for the meal. She had already had the argument with Jane over who paid for the meal, and she won despite Jane's glares. "I don't know either. That was a lot of food, I must say."

Meal paid for, the two walked out to the car and drove to the hotel to take a walk around the block to help with digestion before they went back upstairs to shower and sleep. Maura leaned into Jane's side, the brunette's arm wrapped securely around her.

"What time are we leaving tomorrow?" Jane asked.

"I promised your mother we'd be back for dinner," Maura told her, "and check out is at eleven. If you want to go anywhere else tomorrow we can, but I thought we'd go back after check out and hide in your apartment until we were expected for family dinner. She mentioned inviting Vince and Barry, as well."

"Oh man," Jane groaned. "Ma and Korsak'll end up flirting all night, and I'll have to keep an eye out to make sure when he leaves it isn't to go wait for Ma in the guest house."

"I think it's sweet that they find each other attractive. You should be happy for them if they decide to pursue a relationship."

"I never said I wouldn't be happy for them, because if they want to see each other and go out or whatever, I'm all for it. But if Korsak has to sneak into the guest house because he doesn't want me to know he's, _you know_, with my Ma then I would like to be left in the dark about it."

"Does that mean we won't be sneaking around to, _you know_, when we start doing, _you know_," Maura teased Jane. "You don't have to be so cryptic, Jane. If you use the words you'll find yourself a little more open to the idea of sex."

Jane groaned. "Maura…"

"What? I think you should just let them go their own course like we are. And if you don't want to talk about sex, how will I know when you want it?"

"Trust me, I'll come up with a way to tell you," Jane said, waggling her eyebrows suggestively. Maura gave her a playful push, only to get pulled along when Jane staggered since her arm was around her. "Hey, you asked."

"I didn't ask."

"Fine, you issued the challenge and I responded the only way I could without actually, you know, uh… showing you how I'll tell you when I want… sex," Jane said, face bright red. Maura kissed her on the cheek and then pulled away as they walked into the hotel room to grab her things for a shower. Jane watched for a moment, and then smirked. "So, if I use my words to ask if I can join you in the shower…" Maura shot her a look. "Okay, okay, I won't ask then."

"Maybe next time," Maura told her with a wink before shutting the bathroom door behind her.


	12. Chapter 12

__**I must really love you guys. Seriously, another update? Oh yeah, this is happening. I promise you aren't seeing things.**

**This is mostly a little Rizzles fluff. But hey, who doesn't love that? ;)  
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**Enjoy.  
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><p><em><strong>Jane <strong>_had fallen asleep during the movie, sprawled out underneath Maura on the couch, the blond watching her more than the movie as she drew circles on her stomach with a finger. They were getting comfortable with each other, even more than before Maura had left, and it felt really good to just go along with her impulses when it came to Jane and their relationship.

"What are you thinking?" Jane asked sleepily as she woke up a little.

"I'm thinking about us and our interactions, mostly," Maura answered.

"Good thoughts?"

Maura made a positive noise as she looked up and shifted to kiss the underside of Jane's chin. "All good thoughts, I promise you. You've been doing pretty well with everything. It's been pretty surprising, to be honest. Other than the tension we felt last night at the ocean, we've had very little problems all weekend. In fact, you've been a lot more open with me since Ian left."

"We both knew that it bothered me that he was there," Jane pointed out.

"I know. And I just wanted you to see that we're moving forward."

Jane kissed Maura's forehead before teasingly asking, "Does that mean I can make out with you before bedtime tonight?" Maura smacked her shoulder gently. "What? I'm only trying to fit in with the roles we've set for ourselves. Or, at least the role I've set for myself after last night."

"Oh? And what role is that?"

"Hormonal teenage boy," Jane answered with a grin. "My goal right now is second base."

Maura's face crinkled with confusion. "What does baseball have to do with this?"

"It's a juvenile analogy for the different stages of sexual exploration," Jane explained. "First base is the hand-holding and innocent kissing; second base is the making out and maybe a little soft petting. Third base adds in heavy petting and maybe a little above waist oral stuff."

"And a home run would be the actual act of sex?" Maura asked when Jane paused.

"Yeah, you got it."

Maura twisted so her mouth was next to Jane's ear. "So by your explanation, you'd like to make out and do a little touching?" she asked, her voice low and breathy, earning an unsuccessfully stifled moan.

"Jesus, Maura, you're gonna kill me," she groaned.

"That sounds rather grotesque. As fascinating as I find the dead, Jane, I am not a fan of necrophilia," Maura said, looking down at Jane with a smile.

"Very funny, Dr. Isles," Jane said, trying not to look amused. After a second, she gave in. "All right, that was a good one. You're getting better on this joke making thing."

Maura's face beamed at the compliment. Jane chuckled and kissed her gently on the lips before looking at the clock, sighing at the time. Maura followed her gaze and got up, standing and stretching.

"Man, part of me really doesn't want to go to family dinner," Jane said, also getting on her feet so that she could go to her room to change. "That part is telling me to drag you to bed and hold you hostage until we have to go to work in the morning."

"That would be fine if I hadn't already promised we'd be back in time for family dinner, and your mother is therefore expecting us," Maura reminded her, watching Jane throw a change of clean clothes in her bag after dumping the clothes from the weekend on the floor. "You want to stay with me tonight?"

Jane looked at her. "Is that okay? I mean, I'm basically assuming that you'll even want me there."

"It's all right, Jane," Maura told her with a smile. "I thought you might want some time away from me after having no one but me all weekend."

"Nope, I was serious about that second base stuff," Jane told her with a grin and a wink. Shouldering her bag, she walked up to Maura and planted another kiss. "I'm seriously getting hooked to this kissing you thing."

"Good, because I quite enjoy it," Maura told her. "Shall we get going then?"

_**Frankie**_ was staring at her, which was making Jane a little irritable but she was trying very hard not to snap at him over it. It started during dinner prep when Jane made a point to come up behind Maura just to press up against her backside with the guise of checking out what she was doing. It entertained Maura, and Angela had to bite back her own comments on the subject.

"I sure wish Tommy could've joined us," Angela said trying to distract Frankie so that the glare Jane was sending him would lose some of its edge. "He's working tonight, you know. He said that he was trying to get all the overtime he could get so that he could buy a car."

"That's really good," Maura said smiling at Angela, suddenly very happy that Korsak and Frost had declined the offer to join them tonight. Jane was having a hard time dealing with the looks from Frankie; Maura wasn't sure how she'd deal if it had been all three of them.

"Yeah, he even said that his supervisor is thinking about putting him in a higher paying position because he's so focused on the job."

Jane looked up at Angela. "That will be good for him. Maybe if he's got a goal to work towards he'll stay out of trouble. He's been doing really well so far. I'm pretty proud of him." Angela beamed at the words. Jane had always been hard on her youngest brother because of his mistakes, but it seemed like maybe things were going to be better between the two of them. "Let him know if he needs any help to let me know and I'll see what I can do."

"I will," Angela agreed, smiling widely. Jane offered a smile in return, and then looked to see Maura watching her with pride. Maura knew how hard it was for Jane to be willing to offer help to Tommy, because she was afraid he would end up making another mistake.

Frankie, still studying his sister, grinned. "So how was your weekend?"

"It was good. Maura did a little shopping. We enjoyed the ocean and walked around a lot. The place we ate at last night was really good," Jane answered, looking at him suspiciously.

"You went shopping?" Angela asked. "What did you buy, anything good?"

"I bought a few items," Maura answered. Seeing Angela was about ask more questions about what she had purchased, and this would inevitably lead to Jane's embarrassment, Maura set her glass down and cleared her throat. "Perhaps we should start clearing the table?" she asked, Jane shot her a grateful look as she started gathering her dishes to take to the kitchen.

_**Jane**_ woke up alone sometime in the middle of the night and bolted upright. The bathroom door was open so chances were that it was empty. She reached over and grabbed her gun before getting out of bed and walking slowly from the room and down the stairs, turning on the light to the kitchen when she reached the bottom of the stairs to find Maura leaning against the counter with a glass of water.

"Did I wake you?" Maura asked her voice a little tight. "I'm sorry if I did, I just wanted to get something to drink." Jane reached for the glass and set it aside, her gun next to it, and pulled Maura into a hug. "I'm sorry, Jane."

"What's wrong?" Jane asked gently.

"I couldn't sleep," Maura admitted, sighing as she melted against Jane and breathed her in. "I'm just too restless and I can't quite put a finger on why."

"I'm sure it's my fault, and you're pent up with sexual frustration," Jane said. "I really did try to keep my hands off your chest earlier, I swear."

Maura shook her head and looked up at Jane, amused. "If it is sexual frustration, I'll just have to deal with it for a little while. It's far too late to do anything about it right now even if you were ready for it." She pushed up on her toes to get Jane a quick kiss. "Take me back to bed, Jane. Maybe this time I'll be able to sleep."

"All right," Jane agreed, grabbing the gun and letting Maura lead them upstairs. "I'd apologize if touching your chest earlier caused this, but I'm really not sorry. You're boobs are too nice not to touch whenever I can."

Maura laughed as she slid into bed. "Jane, trust me when I say I'm not sorry you touched them either. I enjoy your touches no matter where they are." Jane crawled into bed and leaned down to kiss Maura. "And I especially love your kisses."

"Wait until you feel my lips on other places," Jane told her with a wink before lying down and closing her eyes, causing her to miss the "o" expression on Maura's face before she pouted.

"You are insufferable," Maura whimpered, turned to snuggle against Jane as she laughed. "Go to sleep. I'm trying to be mad at you."

"Good luck with that."


	13. Chapter 13

**And another chapter update today! :D**

**This chapter gets a little... spicy. Just a forewarning.  
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><p>"<em><strong>You <strong>_look like you could use someone to talk to," Angela said when she approached her daughter sitting alone in the café. "What's going on that's got you thinking so hard?"

"Ma, if I told you I was in love with someone and wasn't sure exactly how to tell them I wanted to be with them, what would you say?"

"I'd say you and Maura looked a little too cozy for you to not have told her your feelings by now," Angela answered.

"Okay, so we've confessed to each other. I know I love her, and I know she loves me. But we've been going at a snail's pace because of what happened before she left and it's killing me," Jane admitted with a groan.

"Oh, honey… Just let her walk in on you naked. I'm sure that'll get the ball rolling." Jane stared at her mother as the woman waggled her eyebrows.

"Oh God, Ma, I do not need to have you and those thoughts in my head at the same time because it's seriously freaky," Jane said shaking her head as though clearing her brain. "I could give that a shot, I guess. But, we haven't even made our relationship official, you know? I mean, she's been sidestepping this whole issue on whether we're girlfriends or not. If we're not dating or whatever, then who's to say she'd give in to… me naked?"

"Go with your gut, then. You do that with your police stuff and it hasn't really failed you, has it?"

"Except in the warehouse when I shot my best friend's father and caused her to leave me for four months," Jane grumbled. "All right, so if I trust my gut… Dammit, Ma, now all I can think about is having her walk in on me naked and getting down and dirty. Thanks, this ought to be a fantastic afternoon at the desk."

"Good luck," Angela told her as she walked away, grinning.

_**When **_five o'clock rolled around without seeing Jane all day, Maura couldn't help but pout a little. She shouldn't expect to see the detective all the time; she did have her own work to do as well. But without a case, she thought Jane would have come down at least once just to get away from the guys upstairs. That didn't mean she had to, but Maura was a little disappointed that she would have to go home without having seen Jane and not knowing if she would see Jane.

Gathering her things, she was surprised to see a text from Jane on her phone.

_Yours or mine for dinner and wine?_

Maura shook her head as she smiled. Jane always seemed to know what she was thinking, she decided as she pressed the call button.

"Hey, babe," Jane answered.

"Are you sure you want to see me tonight? And are you driving while on the phone again?"

"Yes to the first and if I say no to the second will you believe me?"

"When you say it like that, no I don't believe you," Maura told her.

"Okay, so yeah I'm driving on the phone. But I'm almost to my place, so I didn't see the big deal." Maura shook her head at the brunette. "So, your place or mine?"

"You're already at your place, so I may as well join you."

"Do you have a change of clothes here or in your car?"

"I can grab one of my spare changes that I keep here in my office. Are you sure you want me to stay the night? I'm not complaining, but I don't want to become dependent on sleeping next to you," Maura said.

"Trust me, I want you with me," Jane answered. "Call me when you get here so I can get ready."

"Ready? Jane, what are you planning?"

"Would you believe me if I said I'm following my mother's advice on something?"

"I wouldn't if you'd said that any other way," Maura replied. "I'll call you when I get to your door, is that okay? And just know that the fact that you're listening to your mother is very unnerving."

"I should hope so. This wouldn't have happened if… Dammit, Maura, just get over here," Jane growled. Maura laughed and agreed before they hung up. Nervous about what Jane was planning but confident that this was Jane, Maura grabbed her things and left the precinct.

_**Jane,**_ on the other hand, was freaking out. She'd managed to convince Angela to cook something for her this afternoon at the café, which was a godsend, and it was warming in the oven. The table was washed and covered with the third table cloth she found because it was the only one that didn't have a stain on it anywhere and two places were set up on one corner.

Knowing Maura would probably change her mind and head home first to feed Bass if nothing else, she took a shower and shaved and cleaned anything that needed shaving and cleaning, some areas more than once just because she was too nervous to remember if she'd shaved or cleaned there yet. Her teeth were brushed, flossed, and she had gargled mouthwash twice. And slipping on the little black dress that her Maura said she was gorgeous in when she'd escaped to her after her mother tried to set her up with Joe Grant, she walked into the other room just in time for Maura to call her.

"I thought you were coming straight here?" Jane asked when she answered.

"Yes, I was. However, then I remembered Bass and was almost home before I remembered I could have asked your mother to take care of him for me. But, since I was there, I chose to go inside and prepare for this evening before returning," Maura answered.

Jane opened the door and smirked. Maura had dressed up from the skirt and blazer combo that she'd left in this morning to a very fitting red dress that Jane hadn't seen before.

"Looks like it's a good thing I changed," Maura said, eyeing Jane appreciatively. "I would have been underdressed for whatever it is you have planned."

"That was actually my goal, you know," Jane joked, putting down her phone and waving for Maura to come in. "I wanted to be overdressed for once." After closing the door and locking it, the chain sliding in place to hopefully keep out her mother should she decide to come see if Jane followed through with this in the morning, she turned and walked right up to Maura to wrap her arms around her. "You still look absolutely gorgeous, though, and I can't complain about how you look."

"That's good, because I wanted to look very good for you," Maura told her. She could practically taste the change between them, the air charged with the sexiness of Jane's confidence over the situation.

"I would have taken you out for something special," Jane said, pulling away to go to the kitchen and pour two glasses of wine. "But, I thought we should start with something special at home."

"I'm happy with anything, Jane, so long as we're enjoying each other."

Jane grinned as she set the glasses of wine on the table and pulled out the chair for Maura to sit before flitting back to the kitchen to get the meal that Angela had prepared, setting it on the table and serving Maura and then herself before also sitting. She looked at Maura to find her watching her, analyzing what she was doing to try and figure out what was going on. Jane reached over and put her hand on Maura's leg.

"Enjoy," Jane told her, smiling because she knew Maura would have one hell of a time figuring it out. And even if she did, perhaps she would be surprised enough that the purpose of what Jane was planning would be fulfilled anyway.

They ate in silence, stealing glances at each other in the meantime, though Maura's were half curious as well as to admire Jane as she sat there confident in how the evening was going. And then she realized Jane had stopped eating entirely and was just watching her, which caused her to look at her curiously.

"You are just so damn beautiful, you know that?" Jane asked her voice just above a whisper. "God, how could I have not understood how I felt before when that's always been one of my thoughts about you?" Maura's breath caught in her throat for a moment, releasing when Jane's hand moved from her thigh to brush the fingertips across her temple to push a lock of hair behind her ear and away from her eyes. "You are breathtaking, Maura."

"Jane…" Maura breathed. She completely forgot they had been eating dinner; her eyes couldn't leave Jane's, not even when the brunette stood up and pulled Maura to her feet. "Jane, I can't think of the words to describe you right now. You are just so… so amazing."

Jane leaned in to brush her lips against Maura's, lips barely touching as they teased her. "You, my love, are amazing," she whispered, hands brushing up Maura's sides starting from the hips and then curving up over her breasts to slide down her front. "I need to clean up the table. Meet me in the bedroom?"

Maura opened her mouth but couldn't make a noise, she was too dizzy with what she was feeling for coherency. So she closed her mouth and nodded. Jane gave her a brief kiss before stepping back. Suddenly able to think, Maura swallowed hard and stepped back to watch Jane carry plates to the sink and put the food in the fridge. When Jane turned and looked at her, their eyes catching, Maura felt dizzy again.

"Bedroom, Maura," Jane commanded huskily.

"Y-yes," Maura said, turning and making her way back to the room, her pulse pounding in her ears. She took a deep breath, trying to calm down, but as soon as she felt like she might be under control she remember how dark and how hungry Jane's eyes looked when she was told to go to the bedroom.

"Maura…"

Maura turned to see Jane in the doorway, leaning against the frame. "Jane…"

It seemed like no one had moved, but suddenly Maura was in Jane's arms again, lips pressed hard against each other and hands exploring feverishly. Shivering, Maura pulled away for air only to realize that her dress was at her feet. She looked at Jane, watching her eyes scan over her body with undisguised desire, tongue wetting her lips. This time, she shivered for a whole other reason.

"Jane…" Those eyes met hers. "Jane, make love to me."


	14. Chapter 14

_**Frost**_ studied Jane. He'd seen his partner after a while lot of different things, the good ones and the bad ones. But the woman sitting at her desk in front of him was not a side of Jane he'd ever encountered before. She was calm, too calm even, and not from depression like during Maura's absence. No, this was a tranquility that he'd never experienced before that started Tuesday and has continued all week even with a gruesome triple homicide on their plates.

No, something just wasn't right. Frost just wasn't sure how he could figure it out without having his balls kicked to his throat and thus ending the tranquility that seemed to be surrounding his partner.

"Did you find the brother yet?" Jane asked, looking over some of the paperwork in front of her. They had just found out one of their victims had a brother that had been adopted away from the family when he was born.

"Yeah, he's flying in tonight," Frost answered. Jane nodded and set aside the paperwork. "So, uh... Do you want to go on home? I don't mind covering for the next hour if you want to leave early."

"Nah, Maura's still finishing one of the autopsies downstairs. I'm going to wait on her," Jane replied, leaning back to stretch and ignoring the paperwork in front of her.

"How are things with Maura?" Frost watched as Jane's face brightened and a huge grin split her face. "I take it things are that good, huh."

"Uh-huh. God, Frost, I didn't know anything could be so amazing," Jane told him. Luckily the bullpen was mostly empty, or she'd never live down being caught acting sappy. She worked hard to become a badass in the department.

"I'm glad it's all worked out."

"Yeah, me too," Jane murmured. "We haven't had drinks for a while at the Robber. Why don't we all meet up there in a few hours? I'm really in the mood for their chili cheese fries, though I'm sure Maura will fight me on it before I get them anyway."

Frost laughed. "Yeah, I'll shoot Korsak and Frankie a message to let them know. You wanna go down and ask Maura to join us?" He wasn't stupid; he knew Jane was trying to fight the urge to go downstairs. And although he knew she was sincere about getting drinks together, it was also a good excuse to at least talk to Maura.

"Yeah, I'll go see her," Jane said, grinning and getting up.

_**Jane**_ slipped into the booth first, because she knew that Maura didn't really enjoy sliding all the way to the wall when she was in a dress. Frost and Frankie sat across from them.

"No Korsak?" Jane asked.

"Nope," Frankie answered. "He had a date with Ma tonight."

Jane wrinkled her nose as one of the few waitresses walked over. "Can I get you anything?" she asked, smiling at Jane, who proceeded to order beers all around. "Will that be all?"

"For now," Jane told her. "You're a new face on the staff. When did you start working here?"

"I'm Sam's daughter," the waitress explained. "I started a few weeks ago. Why, do I act green?"

"Nah, but it's been a while since I've been in here," Jane answered. "We cops come here a lot, and I hadn't heard about a new face from the guys so I was curious."

The waitress's smile turned coy. "Well, that's too bad that no one told you. I would have liked to have seen you come by earlier. Not many coming through are quite so friendly."

Jane shrugged, not quite reading the girl's body language because Maura's hand had grabbed her thigh and gave it a gentle squeeze. "I, uh, try to be as courteous as possible before I get smashed to make up for what happens after I hit my limit."

"I'm sure there's nothing you would have to worry about, officer."

"Detective," Jane corrected, clearing her throat when Maura's hand moved away from her thigh. "I'm a detective, homicide division." She seemed to notice the waitress's interest in her and shifted uncomfortably, looking at the guys for support. She looked back at the waitress. "These two are also! And, this is the medical examiner," she added nervously, putting an arm around Maura.

The waitress met Maura's eyes and, despite her polite smile, she knew what that look meant. The waitress straightened up and smiled nervously. "Ah, let me get you those beers."

Frost watched her go. "What was up with that?"

"She was very interested in you, Jane," Frankie commented. "Damn, you get the attention of more women than I do!"

"I wasn't trying to!" Jane hissed, hand grasping Maura's as she looked at her. "Honest!"

Maura smiled at her softly. "I know. I don't doubt that you were oblivious. I'm sure you weren't paying too close attention to her." Her hand slipped from Jane's to grab her thigh again. Jane nodded and tried not to blush.

"You two aren't, like, doing anything over there, are you?" Frankie asked. "Because we're in public, and you're both like my sisters. That's all kinds of wrong."

"I, on the other hand, would not mind watching," Frost amended, grinning and shooting them a wink.

Jane glared at him. "There's no way anyone is seeing Maura naked but me," she growled at him. "So don't even think about it, don't imagine it, don't even dream about it. Got it?"

Frost's smile wavered, and he was glad when the beer arrived, because Maura whispered something in Jane's ear that had her grinning even as her cheeks pinked. And he was fighting really hard not to imagine what she might be saying, because his mind could come up with a lot of really good ideas.

Jane took a long drag of her beer and leaned back, letting Maura lean into her. "So, what're the stats for the Celtics right now? I haven't had a chance to catch up this week."

Frankie couldn't stop the laugh as he looked at the two of them. "What had you too busy to check the TV, Janie? It only takes like twenty minutes if you turn on Maura's TV. She's got all the sports channels, I'm sure one of them would have had it."

Jane coughed as she cheeks warmed. "We've been, uh, busy."

"I bet!" Frost laughed. "But, seriously, you guys are, you know, together and all that?"

"If we're not, we've been doing some pretty weird things for just friends," Jane commented. Then, she frowned. "Actually, some friends do those kinds of things. But yes, we're dating, together, whatever word you feel like using. The end result is still that Maura is my girlfriend."

"And Jane is mine," Maura added.

"I think we need some celebratory shots!" Frankie shouted, waving over the waitress and called for some tequila. Jane whispered to Maura to make sure she only has one shot and no more than four beers or she'll be lucky to be able to get out of the booth later. Maura noted that, and made concessions regarding her own intake.

"To Jane and Maura," Frost said, lifting his shot glass. The other three lifted there glasses and, after they tapped in the center of the table, everyone swallowed the shots all together.

"I love you," Jane told Maura, smiling as she watched the guys as they headed for the pool tables.

Maura studied Jane, taking in how relaxed she looked and realized that she'd never seen Jane look so happy and content while awake before. She smiled and kissed Jane's jaw.

"I love you too."

* * *

><p><strong>Yes, this is the end. I was struggling with how to end this story, because I'd completed everything I'd wanted to complete and endings are something I don't like to do. However, I couldn't come up with anything else I could do with this story, and all that was left was Jane coming to terms with taking that final step and call Maura her girlfriend, thus this chapter. Otherwise, I probably would have ended it with that last chapter.<strong>

**Thank you for taking this journey with me. I'm glad that I had some readers who enjoyed my work, though I'm sure it wasn't as amazing as it could have been.**

**Hopefully, this is not the last time we cross paths. Until next time...  
><strong>


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